Monday, March 11, 2013

Fallen by Lauren Kate





Title: Fallen
Author: Lauren Kate
Publisher: Random House
Rating: WARTY!

I got so sick of hearing about the upcoming papal election (what, the finger of God not good enough for the new Pope?!) that I switched from NPR to a music station on the way to work this morning, and they were playing Scream and Shout, but it was the clean radio version, so instead of Britney Bitch, it was Britney Britney, but they had failed to remove the whispery ending to 'Bitch', so it sounded more like Britney Itch! I almost laughed out loud at this. What the heck does this have to do with this novel? Well, there's an itch in it, and she's not called Britney. She's called Molly. Molly? Yeah, Molly. And she's definitely not coddled, but she seems to have little to do with the action in the novel after this apart from popping up a couple of times to warn Luce off Daniel.

So Kate starts out with the usual trope of a new kid in high school (the Sword and Cross reform school - no kidding) and two hunks to compose the standard triangle trope. On this occasion, it would seem that Kate actually has a really good underpinning for the triangle, although the 'high school' bit makes no sense at all. Not so far, anyway and I'm about 35% in at this point.

Lucinda Price (interesting name! I actually dated someone called Lucinda once, and yes, there was a price.) aka Luce is immediately befriended by Arriane - a quirky, rebellious girl who carries the punishment of a wrist bracelet which shocks her when she misbehaves - like when she punches Meatloaf Molly for dumping her lunchtime meatloaf all over Luce because of a minor collision in the cafeteria.

Yeah, Luce! Could it be a more telegraphic name? So Molly, Arriane, and Luce all get punished with 'cemetery duty' at the crack of dawn the next day. Don't get me started on the injustice of this; I hated high school with a vengeance. Cemetery duty means cleaning the gravestones and walkways in a civil war era graveyard (the school is in Georgia, southern USA), but Luce and Daniel Grigori, hunk #1, actually trash it up! When they stop to chat under the lightning bolt angel, the angel crashes down over them. No one is injured, but rather than comfort Luce, Daniel simply walks away. He's so rugged!

A word about Daniel; from the first moment she lays eyes on him, Luce is dangerously attracted; she can't take her eyes off him, but he rejects her by giving her the finger the first time she sees him. After that he keeps sending on-again-off-again mixed signals to her which means that he's a jerk in my book. The only other competition is Cam, hunk #2 (Cam? Yes, Cam. How many Cams are we going to have to endure in these books for god's sakes, before we’re free of that frigging' name?!). Cam is a charmer, which immediately, of course means that Cam is evil incarnate and Daniel is the angel of light.

The name Daniel means 'judged of god' from the Hebrew: 'El' being the god part. Lucinda means light. Arriane is the French version of Ariadne, meaning 'most holy'. Either that or it's a French rocket. Molly is a diminutive of Mary even though it has more letters! No one knows what the hell it means although I favor the Egyptian derivation, where it comes from 'beloved' and has taken on a secondary meaning 'of the sea' from the Latin mare. In addition there’s a Todd ('Fox'), a Roland ('famous'), a Gabbe (Gabrielle - 'god gives strength') and a Penn. I actually know a Gabriela, and she;s called Gabby, too., Why would anyone ruin such a beautiful name with such a foul contraction?!

Cam invites Luce to a party in his room that night where Roland plays records. Yeah, not CDs, not an iPod, but records. And this was written in 2009. O-okay; just keep swimming.... The dorms are completely mixed, and whilst no one actually shares a room, the males and female are roomed right next door to each other. Given that is supposed to be a reform school, so strict that the students are deprived even of their cell phones when they arrive, how this works and how come not one single student or teacher seems to think that there's anything even remotely adrift with this housing scheme is a complete and utter mystery!

When Luce sees Daniel sneak out of the party, she makes a cheap excuse to follow him, so now Luce is a stalker. She overhears him talking to Gabbe and learns that there is something secret going on. Surprise, surprise!

If you didn’t figure out from the title that this is a novel about angels - Fallen angels - then you're more clueless even than I am! I don't normally real this stuff with angels and fairies - although I read a bit about Blackbringer the other day (no, not that day, the other one!) and I admit I was intrigued - but this particular novel sounded like it might be worth my time, and the first two volumes were right there on the library shelf, so I hope Kate won't let me down. There are five volumes in total so far, so if this turns out to be an acceptable read, I have more to look forward to. OTOH, if it's a disaster, I've lost nothing; nothing ventured, everything gained!

One more thing - I was tricked into reading the prologue in this novel, so props to Kate for finagling that. It looked like chapter one, I swear it did! The prologue consisted of a guy rejecting a girl in late Victorian England, and since Luce seems so familiar with Daniel, (hell for short, but not for leather), I guess they've met in a previous life (although how that works remains unexplained, one third the way in). I have to say that this annoyingly reminds me of my own Timeless for which I still don’t have an ending. But unlike Timeless, Fallen is about reincarnation and forbidden love. Timeless is about carnal love for the bidding (I ain't kidding!).

In short, I have to admit a bias against this kind of story. I don’t buy the religious thing at all, although it can make for great fiction, but I have especial problems with that fiction when it tries to make sense of something which is, intrinsically, nonsensical! Religion makes no sense at all except in the light of human ignorance, frailty, mortality, and superstition, so I have to confess a certain interest in what Kate will do with this material. So with that intrigue, and with her writing which is acceptably done so far fro my modest expectations, I'm prepare to suspend disbelief and go with the flow and see what kind of a tale she can tell.

One more detail. Luce was sent to this reform school for reasons which make no sense. This is a weak spot in Kate's plotting IMO. The ostensible reason for it is her lack of a solid grasp on reality (but ain't that religion all over?!). Why she would be sent to a reform school rather than some sort of psychiatric hospital is not explained. If she's not being punished for her boyfriend's death, why the reform school? If she faked herself out of psychiatric hospital why not a regular school? Luce was with a boyfriend - a kinda boyfriend - and she was about to kiss him when he burst into flames. Her memory of what happened is tenuous at best, so she blames herself for his death even though she has no idea of how she could be to blame. It didn’t help that she told people she can see shadows moving, and that bad stuff seems to happen when that happens. She still sees the shadows at her new school.

So medically speaking, she's being abused, but for the novel, she's exactly where she needs to be, but even that is problematical, because once again we have the problem: no one tells the protagonist anything! If only someone would explain to her that she's an angel, it would improve her life immeasurably. The cruelty involved in keeping this from her, especially by Daniel, is inexcusable and is a big turn off so far - unless, of course, Kate comes up with some rationale as to why she, a person of the light, should be kept in the dark! But let’s see how Kate does with this.

Waking up with somewhat of a hangover the morning after the party and recalling Gabbe's words to Daniel along the lines of "I'm the only one you've got" Luce acts like a 13 year old instead of the 17 or so years she's supposed to be and goes into a funk, but since she's shocked out of bed by a demand that all students report to the gym (a converted church) for physical assessment, she doesn’t have time to ponder it too deeply.

I have no idea what the physical assessment is all about because no physical assessment is actually given to the students. Each student is assigned one random physical task to complete, and Luce's is swimming. Even though she's not paying attention and starts off late, she swims like a dolphin and is all set to win the eight-lap sprint when she hears Gabbe say something about Daniel and stops dead in the water, thereby not only losing but proving herself a loser!

I don't know how long Kate plans on condemning her primary protagonist to this fate, but I can see it becoming really tedious after a while. And yes, I know that in real life there are genuine people who are depressed and who can't help their self, and who need and hopefully are getting the help they deserve, but something has gone wrong with Luce! She actually seems more depressing than she does depressed.

She outright asks Roland if Daniel and Gabbe are together, and he refers her to Daniel. She sees Daniel in the gym skipping rope and is abruptly flung out of the gym by those invisible (to everyone but her) shadows. She has to re-enter it to get her key, and ends up telling Daniel that she's sure they've met before. He assures her that they have not and she goes into another funk and fails to ask if he's with Gabbe! Seriously, Luce, tighten up!

Cam breaks her out of her self-pitying wallow-a-thon by luring her to picnic with him in the cemetery instead of going to class, but right when she and Cam are about to kiss, they're interrupted by Gabbe who tells them the teacher is asking for them in class. Of course, when they arrive, the teachers seems not to have even missed them. If Luce can't connect the dots between this with what she overheard between Daniel and Gabbe that dorkish stormy night, then she's not too smart: it would seem obvious that Daniel has asked Gabbe to keep an eye on Luce and keep her from getting too involved with Cam.

This class is conducted in the library by the librarian, whom Luce has met earlier and taken a liking to. She's supposed to be teaching religious history, so how this translates into her authorizing them 15 minutes on the Internet to research their family tree is a mystery. Luce, the worst student ever, blows this off, too, and researches Daniel Grigori instead, but we learn nothing about what she found (if anything). Why she did not also use the opportunity to email her best friend from her previous school is another unsolved mystery given how much she wailed earlier about not being able to be in constant texting contact with her.

That Saturday morning, Luce is visited in her room by Penn who snoops around and then asks Luce if she wants to come and dig through Daniel Grigori's records, to which Penn, for reasons unknown, has access. After declaring that she really doesn't need another reason to be labeled a crazy stalker girl, Luce goes right along with Penn to snoop, but comes up with nothing on the boy. The only thing she achieves is to run into Molly again and discover that Molly knows about what happened with her crispy boyfriend.

As she follows Molly outside and sees her talking with Gabbe, which she hates, she's hit on the head with a soccer ball, but at least it gives Daniel another chance to be a complete jerk, and Luce learns that he doesn't have a girlfriend, so she can stop hating Gabbe. Then Daniel invites her to go for a walk. This is the guy who is evidently trying to avoid her to keep her from harm, and now he's associating with her. He's a complete moron.

They walk through the woods to a lake and swim - not naked, to a rock out in the middle where they sit and talk, and Daniel lies to her that he was burned by a girl and isn't looking to get involved in a relationship. I have no knowledge that it's a lie, I just feel like it is: just another ruse to keep her away from him. This might make it seem like he's not such a jerk, but it makes him worse. He should simply tell her the truth, but again he lies to her. Then he says he has to be somewhere and leaves her on the rock, swimming back across the lake at record speed, and as he gets out of the water on the other side, his body silhouetted in the sunlight, the water droplets dancing around him Luce swears they look like wings. No really?!

So Luce is dragged to the library later that night by Penn who says she has found a book written by Daniel's grandfather, but the book isn’t on the shelf. Penn leaves Luce by the shelf and goes to ask the librarian where the book might be. Suddenly there's a bright flash - curiously right by where Penn was supposed to be going - and the smell of burning arises, with choking smoke filling the library. Luce grabs Todd, the only other person in there, and they try to find Penn and the Librarian, but cannot make it that far. They have to leave, and are hurrying down a corridor filled with smoke, Todd almost panicking, when Luce feels like she's being carried along. Suddenly she and Todd are outside, but a shadow smacks into them hard, knocking them down the steps. Luce passes out.

And awakens in a hospital bed with Gabbe giving her a manicure! Arriane turns up with drinks (alcoholic drinks!), and then Penn shows up. Soon the police and her parents and a lawyer for the school arrive. Todd is dead and they know about Luce's past. Luce pretty much tells it like it was and they leave, but she doesn’t get to go home with her parents. Back at school she's dreading things happening as they did after the last death, but although she gets a lot of looks, nothing more happens.

At the memorial service for Todd in the cemetery, Cam hugs her and suggests that they get out of there, but she doesn’t want to go with him. Immediately afterwards, she takes off with Daniel to the lake again. They sit and talk this time, and she tells him all about the shadows she sees, thinking he'll think she's insane, but he's interested. Right when he says, "This has never happened before," and asks her to tell him about the shadows again, leaning towards her rather intimately, Luce closes her eyes expecting a kiss which never comes! She opens her eyes to find that Daniel has gone, but she can see a curious violet trail where he left.

So is Daniel the world's biggest jerk-off or what? Here was a golden opportunity to ease her mind and tell her everything, explaining what’s happening, and why, and he abandons her again! What a loser! Maybe she's meant to be with him, but if she honestly feels that, after all he's put her through, she's a bigger loser than he is, and she deserves exactly what she gets. I'm sorry but that's the way it is. What are young girls to learn from reading this? That it’s okay - even admirable - to love a guy who treats you like crap and shares nothing with you?!

Unless this story descends into an unsightly morass, I'm committed to finishing it and to reading vol 2 since I already have it, but only if it continues through the rest of this vol (I'm roughly 65% the way in at this point) and into vol 2 without sinking any lower! Daniel is seriously pissing me off right now, and Luce is starting to annoy me with her limp ways. I'm beginning to wonder if Luce is short for 'loosely wrapped'.

The next Saturday is 'Parents Day', and Luce, her mom and dad have a picnic and then take a guided tour of the cemetery (I'm not making this up! Kate is!). When Luce's parents leave, Penn asks her if she will go with her to visit her parents - at the cemetery, where she encounters Daniel sitting morosely on top of a monument! Can we wad this up with any more existential angst?

So Cam next lures Luce out of the school grounds where they meet in a sleazy bar and Cam gets into a fight. Daniel shows up and rescues her. Is Luce stupid or what? Frankly, I don't get her and Cam at all. Why she's interested in him is a mystery, but I get Daniel even less, knowing he could save her from this and he fails repeatedly to do so. Then Cam and Daniel get into a fight in the library. Eventually Daniel asks Luce to come with him to the lake where he tells her a really poor version of the truth: he's immortal and she's reincarnated every 17 years, and she a;ways finds him and as soon as they kiss she turns to ashes and he can't handle it. But they do kiss and she doesn't turn to ashes, which is what's different this time. Later, the librarian is very interested in this event.

So they all decide to go down to the cemetery where they encounter a glow arising from the center, which turns out to be the smackdown between Cam and his giant insect hoard, and Daniel, Gabbe and Arriane, who fight with glowing butterflies. Or something. But Luce isn't allowed to be there so Miss Sophia (the antiquarian librarian) and Penn all head off to another place in the school where Sophia slits Penn's throat, but Daniel arrives and Sophia escapes, so all is well.

Well I've finished the first two volumes of this now and I have to say that I can't recommend this. Not only did Lauren Kate fail to pull it out of the fire, she torched it with napalm. The first volume was barely passable, but two volumes of non-stop whining by the female protagonist is two volumes way the hell too much. Two volumes of the female protagonist not being told anything by anyone and having zero spine to go find out; two volumes of failing to pursue questions (when she has prime opportunities to do so) which would help her to understand; two volumes of doing outright stupid things that put her friend's lives at risk, and two volumes of being so self-obsessed that even when she realizes what the stakes are, her every waking thought is: "What about me?" This is way too much to stomach. No one should be asked to put themselves through the torment of Luce Price's non-stop, juvenile self-pity parade.

I don't care what happens to Luce or Daniel or any other character in this story. They can rot in hell for all I care because I have been given no reason to care and every reason to feel nauseous over the two main protagonists. What they have isn't love, it isn;t transcendent, it's a co-dependent blood letting and both of them need serious psychiatric help. This series is a mess and I refuse to waste any more time on it.