Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Broken Angels by Harambee K. Grey-Sun






Title: Broken Angels
Author: Harambee K. Grey-Sun
Publisher: CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform
Rating: worthy

DISCLOSURE: Unlike the majority of reviews in this blog, I've neither bought this book nor borrowed it from the library. This is a "galley" copy ebook, supplied by Net Galley.

I'm not receiving (nor will I expect to receive or accept) remuneration of any kind for this review. Since this is a new novel, this review is shorter so as not to rob the writer of his story, but even so, it will probably still be more detailed than you'll typically find elsewhere!


Yeah, yeah, you knew I had something going on the side! Well it's another ebook which I'm reading at times when it's not convenient to read the bigger, heftier, hardback version of Daughter of Smoke & Bone. But holding that real book is infinitely more satisfying than holding a Kindle!

This is another ebook published via Amazon's Create Space, which is how my own stuff gets published, so I'll try to be nice! But I have to ask: do you have any idea how many books are out there with Broken Angel(s) as (or in) the title?!! I swear I'm going to write one called Fixed Angel. It's an angel who's trapped, see, like one of those weeping angels in Doctor Who, and it's gorgeous with a cleft chin and unruly hair falling into its muscular eyes, and corded brow, and this plain ordinary girl who has nothing going for her except that her parents are dead, comes along and the fixed angel falls hopelessly in love. Yeah! That's it! That's the one! Best seller here I come! Fixed Angel - Book One of the Awesomely Superb Scintillatingly Heartbreaking Angel Trueloves series (ASSHAT for short, but not for long!). The angel's name is Bryce Cañon, and the girl's name is Mary Su Perchick....

Ooookay! Touching back down on planet Earth, this novel sounds to me like what you'd experience if you took LSD. I've never tried that so I can't speak from personal experience, but if you want to know how I think it feels, read this book! It's whacked. I thought it was going to turn out to be pure religious propaganda (to which you know I don't react well) but it was nothing like H20 (reviewed elsewhere in this blog).

It starts off in a world where at some point in the not-too-distant past, strange flies appeared at random points all over the globe and infected people with a parasite. The flies then disappeared before they could be classified. The parasite is excited by light, and is rather quickly deadly in many cases, being passed on like AIDS. It persists in a very low level in society, and for those people it does not kill quickly, it conveys some supernatural powers rather reminiscent of some of those in the TV show Heroes. These powers seem closely tied to the electromagnetic spectrum, so that the infected ones can change their skin color and even render themselves invisible. They can also elevate themselves above the ground and move as they do so, as well as direct forms of the EM spectrum such as light and infrared, turning them into weapons.

Some people cannot avail themselves of these powers, while others can to a greater or lesser extent. Robert and Darryl both have the power, and work for a lost child investigative agency loosely affiliated with the Heartland Security Agency. Yes, Heartland, don't ask! Why there is this level of importance placed on lost children such that it's even considered for such an affiliation remains unexplained. Darryl thinks of himself as being on a mission to prevent attractive young women (and perhaps men - it's a bit vague on that score) from mating and thereby perhaps acquiring the parasite - although since they exchange spit, how they fail to get infected from him is a mystery.

Indeed, why they would even want any kind of unprotected intimacy with him, since he's obviously infected with the parasite, also remains a mystery. Apparently he can 'persuade' them. It's not quite rape, apparently, because he doesn't have sex with them (unless, of course, your definition of rape is really broad); however, what he does is most definitely a form of coercion/invasion, and is therefore an abuse, but then that's religion for women all over, isn't it?! He achieves his dastardly ends by changing his skin color and bending light to make himself look rather angelic, complete with wings and a halo.

Robert is all business and resents Darryl's absences from his job in pursuit of his religious calling. The two of them do battle with the anarchic and disorganized Infinite Definite (aka the Id - yes, as in Freud) and on one occasion liberate a kidnap victim, Ava, who later disappears from the hospital where she's recovering from the abuse she received at the hands of the Id. Someone - possibly an attractive woman, is following Robert, but she apparently can bend light too, because although he has that sneaky feeling he's being watched, he can't see her.

I never did find out how she was, or if it was revealed, I missed it somehow, but I believe she was a member of a new and more dangerous group than the Id. She was a part of the Killer Vees, a group of women who all have names starting with a 'V'. This part amused me greatly, because they were so dedicatedly weird and dastardly that you had to love them. They make Darryl pay for his sins by kidnapping him and trying to indoctrinate him rather like a religious cult would do.

So after a weird romp on the metro, trying to shake his tail in two shakes of a lamb's tail, Robert finally makes it home to find Ava waiting for him inside his apartment and apparently ready to go at it like bunnies. Hmm! He eventually teams up with her and they eventually bring down their enemies - and nothing naughty happens between them. I liked their interaction almost as much as I liked the Killer Vees.

Yeah, I know: this novel sounds truly weird, doesn't it? Normally I would trash something like this, but for some reason this one grabbed my funny bone and I had to finish the thing. I'm perversely attracted to this story. It was just intriguing and quirky enough to keep me going, so I'll rate it as a worthy.


Monday, April 29, 2013

Daughter of Smoke & Bone by Laini Taylor







Title: Daughter of Smoke & Bone
Author: Laini Taylor
Publisher: Hachette Gook Group
Rating: WORTHY!

This novel was amazing, but that doesn't mean that there weren't issues with it, as I shall describe below; however, I was sufficiently impressed with it that I wanted to launch into the sequel right away. Fortunately I had that option because I came late to this series. It would have been really annoying had I to wait a year or something like that before I could get started on volume 2.

There was a magnificent thunderstorm going on overhead as I initially wrote this, with heavy rain and even hail! It was beautiful, and amazing, and highly appropriate to this story as I sat here with a nice hot cuppa, feeling warm and dry, and reading onwards, ever onwards.

The main protagonist here is Karou, a 17-year-old art student living in Prague (a location which made an impression on the author when she was working on another project). Kudos to her for having the smarts to set her novel away from north America, which is the center of the world to far too many YA authors. Karou was raised by chimera and is taught to despise and fear angels. So immediately we know who her "other half" is going to end up being, don't we?

The saddest thing about Karou is that we meet her in this story as she feels like she desperately needs a man to complete her. That's an appalling thing to do to a character, especially if you're a female author, and it's entirely the wrong message to send to young readers. No, no girl needs a partner to complete her unless she's appallingly weak. It's not a strength to come into a relationship being needy, and it will doom the relationship eventually. Karou lost a lot of my sympathy right there, as indeed would a guy if he'd expressed the same kind of feelings.

Karou lives in a world full of the utterly amazing, and while I am sure it would feel a wee bit mundane to her, having lived with it all her life, Karou's character shows us that she's not jaded with her world by any means, yet I started out feeling that she would break into song ("Some Day My Prince Will Come...") before so very long. Fortunately, she doesn't have seven chimera doting on her, otherwise I'd really have begun to worry! I hoped, as I continued into this, that there was more to her than we learn in the first few chapters and I was, thankfully, granted that wish.

Talking of which, in addition to living amongst the amazing, Karou gets wishes granted. One of those was her "natural" azure hair. She never needs to touch up her roots. She also has some rather evil African beads which grant her very minor wishes, and which we find her employing during one of her classes, to inflict uncomfortable and embarrassing itches on the nude model, who happens to be her ex. He wants her back, but she very wisely wants nothing more to do with him. I was glad to see that resilience in her.

Karou's best friend is the petite Zuzana who knows nothing of Karou's real life and is from time-to-time annoyed by her secretiveness. Zuzana (along with all the other art students at the academy which Karou attends) think that the amazing drawings Karou does are from her crazy imagination, and that the stories she tells about the characters she draws are wild inventions, but Karou finds it easier to tell the truth about her family, all the while pretending it's oddball fiction. In that way, she's never caught in a lie. Her friends have no idea that they are real-life portraits, and real stories of her "family", which consists of the grim, dour Brimstone, who has ram's horns inter alia, the cobra-esque Issa (evidently like a mermaid but with a sea snake tail rather than a sea bass tail), Twiga, who sports a giraffe-proportioned neck; and Yasri who has a bird's beak. There's also a little messenger bird called Kishmish, who summons her to do Brimstone's bidding. And that's where the story takes off.

Brimstone's employment of Karou is an oddity in itself. She will discover his need for her services via a terse message brought to her by Kishmish always, it seems, at an inopportune time. His requirement is invariably the same: she is to go to one part of the world or another and buy teeth with the money he gives her, returning them to Brimstone's den. Karou can travel easily because the door to Brimstone's den opens into every city in the world. She can leave from it at any time and go anywhere, but in order to get back, she has to knock on a certain designated door and wait for Issa to let her in. One time she has to go to Paris to get elephant tusks, another time to Singapore to get reptile teeth. Brimstone won't tell her what he does with these teeth.

So having established all this, we next move on to Akiva, the standard trope angel of the story, whose muscles are corded on his arms. Yes, corded! Now someone needs to tell me what these angels of light are doing with their muscular bodies. Why is that muscle needed? In all this time no one ever explained this to me. They have the power of a god behind them (so we're expected to believe - the most powerful force in the universe), so why would they need muscles? Akiva can burn his hand-print on a door - as long as it's wood, I never learned what happened if the door was metal or plastic. So again, why would he need muscles? With all this angelic power and an omnipotent god, why does Akiva - or any angel - need corded muscles? And don't even get me started on his ethereal beauty and his burning eyes. Why are they so beautiful? Rest assured that he also no doubt has a smokin' bone from which you should most definitely protect your daughter....

Clearly this is nothing more than wish-fulfillment on the part of the author - the tedious trope muscular guy with hair falling into his eyes and a rebel attitude. I already thoroughly detest him and his ilk, and at that point, while I sincerely hoped that the story would improve (it did, fortunately), but I also sat in disbelief at the lack of inventiveness on the part of YA authors; at their short-sightedness and inability to create something new and original. Then I wondered, "Whose wish-fulfillment is going on here?" These YA authors are only supplying what the readership is demands, so maybe the problem isn't the authors, but the readership - the sad state of USA teen females who cannot see beyond the end of their nipples? But no, it's the writers, too. Writing is often described as a solitary, even lonely, profession, but actually it's a team sport. The writers work in tandem with the readers. The author creates the bobsled, but the readers agree to board it with them in exchange for a wild ride - or not. You can't sell what no one will buy, and you can't read what no one will write. The bottom line, however, is that writers could change this if they chose so to do, so it's more on them than on the readers.

So having established Akiva, we have to get the two of them together, and this occurs on a weird mission upon which Karou is dispatched at Brimstone's urging. He even said "please" in his note. In fact, that was all he said, which intrigued Karou. When she visited him, she learned that he feared she had chosen to leave the chimera! This was not even something she'd considered possible, let alone considered doing. She's sent to Morocco to get human teeth, and as she left, she was spotted by Akiva who was approaching it for the purpose of burning his hand-print on it. So he sees Karou leave and is sufficiently intrigued by her youth, appearance, and general demeanor that he starts following her through the city.

He watches her meet her mark and buy some teeth (not the juvenile ones - Brimstone only took the mature ones), but then the seller sees Akiva, as does the deformed angel on the seller's back, and as does Karou. Her mark warns her to run - run and warn Brimstone that the seraphim have got back in! She runs, but is intercepted by Akiva right at the door through which she's desperately seeking to make her escape. A fight ensues, but he fails to kill her and she uses her eye tattoos - the ones on the palms of her hands, to blast him. He asks her who she is before the door is finally opened and Issa lets her inside.

So now we have the male protag fascinated by the female, but we're not done with Karou yet. When she sneaks behind a door she's not supposed to go through, Brimstone himself literally throws her out! She's out in the cold, but at least she has her apartment to retreat to, half undressed as she is. Note to self: if I'm ever going to sneak through a demon door, make sure I'm fully clothed for the outdoors, and also that I have my purse and sketch pad with me. Oh, and those burned imprints on the doors? They go off like incendiary bombs and Karou discovers this when a burning Kishmish dies in her hands. He was sent to her with one thing which is tied to Brimstone: a wishbone he always had around his neck - a wishbone he absolutely forbade Karou ever to touch. And now she has it in her hands, making a wish that she can get to Brimstone and her family and nothing happens.

Well, one thing happens - her BFF Zuzana is with Karou and sees this creature burning, and after a wish demo using one of Karou's African beads, Zuzana is fully on board with the truth about her friend. Talking of wishes, Karou starts hunting down those teeth suppliers she knows of who visited the shop personally, and were paid with wish coins. There are several denominations of wish coin, and Karou needs one of a specific value to get the wish she wants - to be able to fly.

Meanwhile, Akiva has tracked down Karou and is spying on her through her bedroom window, creepily watching her sleep. That's never a good thing and if anyone tells you it's a sign of true love, just slap them upside the head, and walk away quickly. This story had been awesome so far, but I felt I was really going to start disliking it if it was to become a tired YA romance drowned in trope and cliché after having had page after page after page of refreshing, warming, interesting novel.

I think I should say a word here about instadore (my word for insta-love since it never is love - it's infatuation, or lust, or cluelessness). There's an element of it in this novel, but it's nowhere near as badly done as it is in some other stories I've read. I'd mention the execrable Felon (not its real name, but maybe what it ought to have been titled!), but then I'd have to go rinse my mouth out with carbolic. I think there's a case for distinguishing between instadore in a paranormal romance and the same thing in your common-or-garbage romance, because they aren't the same thing - hence the paranormal part!

There's a distinction to be made between a supernatural compulsion and an ordinary infatuation, so I think we need to allow a bit more leeway there, but having said that, there are limits! I don't think Taylor exceeds them, but she comes closer than I like. Yes, she reports undercurrents between the two main protagonists, and sometimes she makes me feel a tad nauseous with her excess, but in general, she does a good job of showing this powerful attraction while keeping it tamed.

Moving right along, now! It was inevitable that Karou would realize, even though she could not see him, that someone (Akiva) was tailing her, so she lay in wait for him and a fight ensued during which he parried her attack without striking out himself. Once she blasted him with those eyes on her palms, he was pretty much done, and she hesitated then, failing to deliver a death blow. We're to learn that there's a really interesting parallel to this. Eventually, Karou takes him back to her apartment where they talk and slowly, an uneasy truce is born between them.

Zuzana came over and checked him out, but as they were all making their way over the river bridge the next morning, Karou still intent upon finding that portal back to her family, Akiva's two war buddies, Hazael and his sister, the feisty Liraz, showed up demanding to know what was going on with Karou - demanding to know who she was. Yes, they had been spying on him, and brilliant warrior that he was, he hadn't even noticed. More absurd, they had watched him being beaten within a cubit of his life by Karou, and had failed to intervene! Some friends, huh? That struck me as decidedly weird and not in keeping with the intent of their kind: a disbelief no-longer-suspended moment.

So on the bridge right before this showdown, there's this weird scene where Akiva espies the wishbone which Karou wears around her neck - the one she inherited from Brimstone. The weird thing is that this literally brings Akiva to his knees, and while he's down there, his face against her legs, he next buries that same face in her hair?! How does he do that given that her hair does not come down to her knees? Does Akiva also have a giraffe neck? That just sounded really strange to me - something a decent book editor would have caught.

And then there's the Liraz insult! (I would love to read a story about Liraz!) "...Liraz was more frightening, she always had been; perhaps she'd had to be, being female." What the heck does that mean? And this is written by a female writer! But it was not about humans, it was about angels! Are we to understand that there's genderism in Heaven? Given the misogynistic tone of both the Bible and the Koran (and all too much religious literature), that wouldn't surprise me at all. I'm sure glad I'm not going to heaven.

But here's the angle on angels: if angels have no genitals, then what does it even mean that there are "males" and "females"? Yes, I understand that the eternal genitals don't define gender, it's the size of the gamete, the larger one defining the female, but this doesn't rob me of my point, which is: what would be the point? And how in hell (strike that - how in heaven!) can there be relationships with them as depicted in so many books?! How can there be half-breeds? And whence did this 'angels have no genitals' even derive? It's never mentioned in the religious primary sources (where angels are, of course, exclusively men and, as far as we can be expected to believe, must be just like men, genitals included, otherwise why specify their gender?).

Frankly, I can't get into this 'war in heaven' angels & demons crap and take it seriously, I really can't, which is why I'm probably the best placed writer to write the definitive angel story, if I could only get my act together...! But it does mean that I'm paying Taylor a really big compliment (indeed, an entire complement of compliments) when I say I have enjoyed this story more than all too many of the stories I've waded through recently.

Now would be a good time to relate Akiva's flashback if I wanted to reveal any more story, but I won't. The flashbacks did interrupt the flow of the narrative somewhat, but they didn't seem that bad to me, and they were necessary. Whether they could have been added in a different place to better effect is debatable.

I liked this novel overall. Yes, there was still too much cliché and trope, but I was willing to overlook that for the enjoyment the rest of it brought me, so I rate this a worthy read.


Friday, April 26, 2013

Ripped by Shelly Dickson Carr






Title: Ripped
Author: Shelly Dickson Carr
Publisher: New Book Partners
Rating: worthy with reservations!


DISCLOSURE: Unlike the majority of reviews in this blog, I've neither bought this book nor borrowed it from the library. This is a "galley" copy ebook, supplied by Net Galley. I'm not receiving (nor will I expect to receive or accept) remuneration of any kind for this review. Since this is a new novel, this review is shorter so as not to rob the writer of their story, but even so, it will probably still be more detailed than you'll typically find elsewhere!

I started out liking this although the Cockney nonsense is way overdone. Yeah, Whitechapel is within a mile or so of St Mary Le Bow - the church within the earshot of which you have to be born to be a true Cockney, but let's not run away with ourselves, shall we?! Cockney hasn't always meant what it means today. FYI, St Mary's was designed by Sir Christopher Wren, who also designed St Paul's. The chapter titles of the book are based on Oranges and Lemons, an old nursery rhyme the words of which seem to be tied to the sound the various bells supposedly made. But with sixty chapters, there's an insufficiency of verses in that ditty to title them all so the author has to make up a few weird ones to fill the gaps.

The first interesting thing about this novel is that it's purportedly written by Shelly Dickson Carr, but it's copyrighted to Michelle Karol. There's no explanation for this that I can find in the ebook, and there's no information about Carr or Karol on wikipedia. I can only conclude that the author is trying to siphen off some publicity value from her renowned grandfather, John Dickson Carr whose novel The house at Satan's Elbow I reviewed back in July 2013.

My first problem with it arose with the instadore Toby character who was your typically profoundly boring he-teen and the masturbators of the universe type. Seriously, can we not get away from this tedious rubber-stamp male love interest? Apparently not. It would be nice if he turned out to be the villain, but it never looked like that was going to happen. I find it abhorrent that women - especially modern independent women like Katie - are constantly attracted in these novels to men who treat them like dirt of which calling her 'pet' and 'lass' are the least of his infractions. This is an appalling message to send to young women.

Anyway, the novel begins with Katie, an American teen living in London with her grandmother. Her sister is Courtney (as in Courtney Love, but not really) who is in a punk band which is apparently very successful, but this sister can’t be bothered to call her sister, and she plays no part in the story. Katie and Courtney's parents are conveniently dead - a major trope for YA novels. While Katie is getting ready to visit Madame Tussauds waxworks (yes, bad grammar, but that's the way it is!) with Collin (yes with two L's), a cousin, she notices how much the portrait (which her grandmother has conveniently dug out of storage and placed in her room) looks like Courtney. Note that Katie is a history buff - yeah, we get it, time-travel, history buff, going to see the waxworks exhibit of Jack the Ripper, etc etc. Let’s get on with the story instead of reading the Daily Telegraph, shall we?! So off they go to Tussauds where they meet Collin's friend Toby, of course, with his dark eyes, cleft chin, unruly hair, and devilish manner.

Aforementioned issues aside, the story is reasonably well written, and very readable. As long as it didn’t insist upon straying over the line, I could see myself enjoying it, but it all depended on how strong that line was and how good Shelly Dickson Carr/Michelle Karol was at coloring inside it, which promised to be problematical given that Toby inappropriately kept grabbing at Katie as they entered the chamber of horrors, as though she was a worthless weak slip of a girl who needed to be manhandled or she would wilt away and die like a plucked flower. That Katie reacted so limply to his inappropriate behavior gave me little hope that she would turn out to be a decent female protagonist.

I have to say that Madame Tussauds has improved dramatically since I went through it if it’s anything like Karol/Carr describes (although I doubt it actually is anything like Karol/Carr describes!). I was disappointed in the sad, tired, and dusty exhibits, but Karol/Carr has the exhibit featuring lasers and holograms, and narrated by animatronics figures. It's been a long time since I was there, so maybe it improved.

Carr also goes well past the accepted victims of the Ripper (which numbered five), adding three fictional ones. Molly Potter was never a victim: it was Elizabeth Stride who was part of the double murder along with Catherine Eddowes. And no, Eddowes was neither buxom nor a singer by profession, although she did sing to herself apparently, but I prefer George Carlin's version of the 'Tara-raboom-de-eh' (Tara-raboom-de-eh, did you get yours today? I got mine yesterday, that's why I walk this way...!), so Carr was evidently planning on having Katie change history. There are those who argue that Stride was not a Ripper victim, and others who argue that she was, but that the Ripper was interrupted before he could carry out his grisly obsession in full, and that's why Catherine Eddowes was murdered just an hour later. The Ripper's blood lust had not been slaked. The actual last victim was Mary Jane Kelly - and no, she didn’t look like Marilyn Monroe or Anna Nicole Smith, not even close, but Carr has the last victim as Lady Beatrix Twyford, who happens to be the same woman who was in the portrait back in Katie's room at her grandmother's! So yes, an interesting twist, if that's what it is. It reminds me of my own Timeless in some regards.

So there's this exhibit called The London Stone which is fictional (The London Stone actually resides in Cannon Street, but it was once a part of St Swithun's church). The stone has magical powers according to Carr, and of course when Katie touches it, determined to save her distant relative's life, she's transported back to 1888 London, where Collin and Toby also conveniently exist, but their Victorian versions! That was a little too convenient for me, but I decided to give her some rope and see if could anchor this ship or hang herself with it!

So Katie ends up in the Duke's house and Katie overhears him arguing with his granddaughter Lady Beatrix's intended fiancé - except that the Duke of nuke 'em, doesn't intend any such pairing to take place. So conveniently for the plot, he makes a deal with Major Brown that if he gets himself elevated significantly in rank at Scotland Yard, then the cantankerous Duke will give his consent to their marriage, otherwise he leaves Beatrix alone. And of course, Lady Beatrix is indeed the woman in the portrait in Katie’s room.

Katie goes to a play (Jekyll & Hyde) at the Lyceum theater, which happens to be managed by Bram Stoker, who is married to a prior love interest of Oscar Wilde, with whom they travel to the theater. This sounds far fetched, but it is in fact true! Whether Wilde went to see Jekyll & Hyde at the theater I can't say, but he was a friend of Stoker, contrary to the inaccurate and inappropriate way the relationship is portrayed n the novel. Indeed, Stoker visited Wilde in France after his self-imposed exile subsequent to the imprisonment which effectively shattered Wilde and robbed us of his talent.

Also at the theater is actress Lily Langtree, and the Prince of Wales is in attendance as well, but this was after their affair, so there was nothing untoward going on there. However, since Langtree was in the USA in August 1888, it would have been just a bit difficult for her to have been at the Lyceum that night! I have no explanation for why Carr felt such an interfering need to drag historical characters around like this and for no reason at all: none of this contributed to the novel. On the contrary - it distracted from it. James Whistler, for example, became very happily married in 1888, so it's highly unlikely that he'd be hanging out in cheap and nasty London pubs and be haring around London with Oscar Wilde, with whom he'd had an increasing rift since the mid-1880's.

There's also a major (I use that term advisedly!) red herring afloat in trying to implicate Gideon Brown, Beatrix's fiancé, as the Ripper. This is tied to missing opera glasses, the absence of which is completely done to death to the point of being really annoying. I don't know if this is a ham-fisted attempt to implicate him and mislead us, or a ham-fisted attempt to point to the true killer. Brown's motive might have been to generate a series of high profile crimes which he will solve and thereby garner a much-needed promotion for himself, but if that was the case, he failed, because the Ripper's crimes were never solved! I don't buy Brown as the Ripper. I might buy the Duke as such, perhaps not directly, but indirectly, in a desperate attempt to thwart (yes, thwart, I said it!) Brown's ambition for his granddaughter's hand, but even that is weak.

The opera glasses are of interest only for the fact that a set were found by the body of the Ripper's first victim (in this fiction, not irl). That victim was indeed Mary Ann Nichols. The opera glasses were quickly purloined by this guy Cross (whose first name is changed in this novel for reasons as unexplained as they are unnecessary). Carr demonstrates an apparently whimsical bent for altering the details of the Ripper murders and for no reason at all that I can discern. By all means play with history if it benefits your fiction, but random change without any purpose is merely annoying to me. She apologizes for this in an end note title "Notes to the curious" but nowhere in that does she offer a rational accounting of the myriad and gratuitous changes in details, which she misleadingly describes as "changed slightly" and a "bit of factual tinkering". No, they were not! They were changed wholesale, manufactured out of nothing and for no reason. I was set to give this novel a somewhat disapproving 'worthy' once I saw the loose ends being tied off at the end and figured that other readers might take to it a lot more readily than I did, but after reading the notpology "note" I was so annoyed by it that I really wanted to renege on that agreement with myself; however, I shall hold to my promise.

So naturally we wonder about the perp in this story, and there are several possible candidates. I discount Brown, as I've mentioned. There's also something not quite right with the Reverend Pinker who is with the theater party, and while I would like it to be him, I excluded him, too. I still can find no explanation for his meandering through this tale; it would have remained almost exactly the same story had his character been entirely absent from it.

I've also considered that Lady Beatrix herself - a character who is hardly in this story at all - is a potential Ripper, but after all this, my suspicions fell heavily on Collin right from the start. Of course, as you all know if you read my reviews, my guesses are typically worthless! So were they in the case? You'll have to read the story to find out. Perhaps I'm supposed to mistakenly think it's Collin; Carr is dropping endless, really clunky blaring announcements that it's him, while having Collin point an accusing finger at Brown. This ought to make me think it isn't Collin. OTOH, perhaps Carr is being so brazen with the clues because she wants us to think she wouldn't drop these massively telegraphic "hints" if it actually was him! Who knows - maybe it's Toby and he's implicating Collin out of resentment that he has to spend so much of his life keeping him out of trouble?

There are some serious errors over Mary Ann Nichols. She was not in her early twenties as Carr claims, but in her early forties and rather grey-haired! That's hardly a slight change, and the reason for it, which we learn of later, isn't exactly a plot killer. But even if we allow this first one to slide, where is the logic for changing any of the others? Contrary to their popular portrayal, the Ripper victims were not the young innocent women they're all too often misrepresented as in such stories. With the sole exception of the Ripper's last Canonical victim, Mary Jane Kelly who actually was in her mid 20's, all of the victims were in their forties. These poor women were old before their time, and were worn and rather rough people, down on their circumstances and leading sad lives as casual prostitutes. This doesn't, of course, mean they merited death, nor does it mean they merited ill-treatment of any kind, so let's not disrespect them by mis-portraying them.

But the real problem with Carr's story here is that Nichols was killed at about 2:30 am, so there's no way in hell she could have died while Katie and her party were at the theater! And on the topic of 'whilst' vs 'while' - it's highly unlikely that a lower class seller of peanuts in the theater would say 'whilst' as opposed to 'while'! But we writers sometimes have a hard time not writing 'whilst' don't we? I torment myself over it often! Anyway, the theater trip was a mess, and it was glossed over in some respects, so we cannot tell who was in their seat and when. Also it was a long way from where Mary Nichols died, so it wasn't like someone could have slipped out, killed her and slipped back in very conveniently. Does this mean that no one at the theatre did it? The only one absent was Brown, who arrived very late and was the last one in possession of those opera glasses....

Other than the absurd obsession with those damned opera glasses, what bothered me most was about the theater was that Katie sat next to Oscar Wilde during the performance, was talking with him often, but never once thought to try and warn him to beware of the Marquess of Queensberry!

On the topic of language, Carr does a pretty decent job, but she comes off the rails once or twice as I discuss here. Worse than this, however, is the Cockney. It grated on my nerves with every obsessive-compulsive use of it, and it's way, way, w-a-y overdone. On language in general, a Brit would never say 'spigot' for faucet, for example, as she has present-day Toby do. They wouldn't say 'faucet', either; it's 'tap'. And I've never encountered an example of anyone of the upper classes refer to a friend as 'old sod'! I have no idea where she dug that one up. Neither would the old Duke say 'insure' in place of 'ensure'.

The common Cockney for suit is 'whistle' as in 'whistle and flute', not 'bag of fruit' That latter one might be allowable, but I've never heard it used! Later she has Toby use the term 'Scapa Flow' rhyming with 'go', but this usage would never have occurred in 1888 since 'Scapa Flow' refers to a British naval base not used before 1919, so Toby would not have known it. It has nothing to do with the term 'scarper' which does mean to beat a hasty retreat and is much more the kind of term Toby would have realistically used.

Carr also has the 1888 boys use the term 'rum and coke' rhyming with 'joke', but this term was not in use either, since Coca Cola had not been invented! Its precursor was only invented in 1886, and the Coca-Cola Company wasn't even incorporated until early 1888, so it was very highly unlikely that it would have crossed the Atlantic and been in sufficiently popular usage as a drink to be appropriated by the Cockney tongue in only five months. Carr tries to get around this by having them claim that 'coke' refers to a form of coal, but this excuse isn't even worthy of respect. It makes no sense whatsoever to talk about rum and coal!

She also has Collin use the phrase "That's not bleedin' funny", but I seriously doubt that the well-bred son of a Duke would drop letters or use the word 'bleeding'. Toby, yes, but not Collin; it simply didn't strike me as realistic. She has us believe that the Duke would issue Collin with a pocket knife for use in fights. This, again, didn't have any veracity in it for me at all. I keep trying to like this story, and it would be easy to do so in general terms, if the suspension of my disbelief wasn't let crash to the floor so frequently!

Anyway, having failed (for that matter, not even tried!) to save Mary Nichols, Katie unaccountably goes to her inquest. I can see no reason for this, especially since the bulk of the 'inquest' is completely fictional. Carr has Mary Ann's father, for example, show up, and she names him Jeffrey Nichols! It's 'Geoffrey' which is the English version of this name and which would most likely have been in use in that era, but all of that part of this novel is complete nonsense! Mary Ann's father was actually Edward Walker. I have no idea why Carr has completely fictionalized this.

Before Katie turns up at the inquest, she's forced by circumstances to share her secret with Toby and the increasingly obnoxious Collin, but instead of telling them that she'a a time-traveler, she claims she's clairvoyant. After passing a test set by the skeptical - or is it sceptical?! - Toby (who isn't quite skeptical enough!) she wins them over to her side in her attempt to stop Jack the Ripper, and this puts a fly in my Collin-is-the-Ripper ointment, because on a trip back to the future, Katie learns something. She also learns that future Toby has time-traveled and that she can only make one more trip: three's the charm evidently for time travel using the London Stone.

I must say that Carr has her menu rather heavily larded with herring regarding Collin's implication in the murders at this point, but whether they're red or not remains to be seen. The fly in the ointment regards Collin's short lifespan. Note that when Katie attends the inquest, Collin has less than a week to live - according to a glance at her family Bible back in the future which, of course, records births, deaths and marriages. In that Bible, Katie discovers the the Collin from the past died on September 9th, which means he couldn't have murdered Mary Kelly on November 9th.

However, since Katie returns to the past resolving to save Collin from his premature death, perhaps in rescuing him, she condemns Mary Kelly to die? The problem with the family Bible in this context, is that this is a rather peculiarly (although not exclusively) American thing, not really a British thing. Though Bibles were used for such records in England in the Victorian era, the tradition died; however, lets assume that this particular Bible may have been used in Victorian times and then simply kept in storage without the tradition continuing. See - I can compromise!

I have to say I think Katie's assessment at the inquest (prompted by the smell!) that people only washed once per week seems overly generous of her! There was a phrase in England 'Ne'er cast a clout 'til May be out' which means no-one takes off their winter clothing until the weather warms up. They live work and sleep in their one winter outfit, and perhaps take a bath in the spring, so bathing even once per week is stretching it IMO! The problem is that none of us lived back then, and we have little to go on as to the daily lives of your everyday working classes which I find really sad. So once/week it is!

But if I allow that, then I have to say "No! Shelly Carr, it's libelous to tell your readers that people were still jailed for witchcraft in the Victorian era in Britain, even if those words leave the mouth of one of your characters!" That accusation isn't true at all. The last trial for witchcraft in Britain was in 1712, and that woman was reprieved. Such superstition! That doesn't mean people didn't believe in such absurdities, but it's not illegal to believe crazy things. Not even in Britain. And let's contrast that with the USA, shall we? The Salem witch trials took place in 1878, just a decade before the Ripper era, and we all know how evil those were!

Carr also gives us misinformation about "Long Liz" Stride, one of the five Canonical Ripper victims, but one who may not actually have been killed by him (or her!). Katie conveniently happens to run into Liz in a pawn shop where she, Toby, and the obnoxious Collin are attempting to buy back the opera glasses which Cross has pawned. Stride is pawning her wedding ring which is dated 1881 (the year of the famous gunfight at the OK corral!), but Stride actually married in 1869, and her husband didn't disappear, as is implied in this novel. The two of them simply broke up, and Stride had no children. The dock worker she lived with (not married to) was named Michael, not Alfred. Why Carr has changed all of this remains at mystery.

Toby, in an attempt to find the truth from Katie about how she knows what she knows, takes her, in a Matrix-moment(!) to the 'Oracle' at the Tower of London (about which there's a rather large and unnecessary info-dump which I skipped), but the Oracle cannot see or hear Katie. Yes, the Oracle is blind, but she can't see her psychically! It's like she doesn't exist. This spooks Toby, so he takes her onto a London Underground train - at that time hauled by steam engines, where the carriages supposedly fill with noxious fumes. I can't buy that. Yes, I can buy that it smelled down there and was less than the most pleasant experience, but not that it was the gas chamber which Carr portrays. But Katie gives in and 'fesses up to Toby that she's a time-traveler.

So off Toby and Collin go to warn "Dark Annie" Chapman that she's made the cut next on the Ripper's hit parade. Why they do this is a complete mystery, Why not simply follow Annie around on the night the Ripper gets her and apprehend him there and then, before he can kill her?! Again Carr gives misleading information about Chapman. Carr describes her as tall when she was actually the shortest of all the victims, at only five feet. And Carr claims that in age, she looked thirty but could have been anywhere between twenty and forty, when she was in fact the oldest victim at almost fifty. Carr gives her black hair when it was actually dark brown, and has her married to a military man when she had never married any such person and was living with a sieve maker when she was murdered. Again, why change these facts? It makes no sense, adds nothing whatsoever to the story, and is just plan annoying, to say nothing of outright insulting to these murder victims. What does Carr hope to gain by this behavior, other than alienating an intelligent, thinking readership?

Annie Chapman is murdered as is "Georgie" Cross. Both Toby and Katie now are convinced, because of the circumstances, that Brown did it, but the fact remains that Collin had the opportunity to kill both of them. Toby was there at the time and failed to prevent it. Katie and Toby tell the Duke what happened and that they believe it was Brown, and the Duke believes them. He's now convinced that Brown is setting up Collin in order to use his implication in the Ripper murders to blackmail the Duke into consenting to his suit for Beatrix.

I have to say that the further this story is drifting from what actually happened. the less I'm enjoying it. It's like reading historical fiction about Martin Luther King and finding that he's white, or reading that Oscar Wilde was a little wuss who couldn't defend himself...oh, wait a minute, Carr actually did imply that! I'm anxious to see how this pans out if only to learn whether Carr actually can account for the disturbing number of stretchers she's employed, because I find it hard to believe that a writer would take this many liberties without having a good reason for it. Will this confusion of victims pan out? What will actually happen to Dora Fowler, for example - who absurdly turns up at Annie Chapman's house (which is where Carr has Chapman killed) after the murder? Must we suspect Dora as the Ripper now?!

After an absurd chase around London's Whitechapel district, Katie runs into Dora and they both start climbing the skeleton of Tower Bridge, which was two years into an eight-year build at that time. The ostensible reason for this is that Toby and Collin are up there, but we're offered no good reason at all as to why they are up there, so all we can conclude is that Carr is taking a page out of the 2009 Sherlock Holmes movie and having her finale on the structure.

The problem with this scheme is that the superstructure couldn't have been started until the two deep anchor pilings were in place and those had to be excavated and filled with 70,000 tons of concrete before the twin towers could be built on them. The towers themselves were only half finished in 1892, so there would have been precious little to scale four years earlier in 1888, as this drawing confirms!

Once again, Le Stupide prevails as Katie abandons Dora on the scaffolding, and continues alone to try and reach Collin and Toby up top (which of course didn't exist in 1888). Note that this is the girl who came back to the past with the express intention of thwarting Jack the Ripper, leaving one of his known victims (known to Katie, not known in reality) defenseless as she climbs up in a brain-dead effort to find Toby and Collin. When she gets up there, she finds both of them: Toby unconscious, and Collin fighting Major Brown. At this point we know one fact for certain: We know that Brown is going to fall into the river and be presumed dead, but that he will actually not be dead, and sure enough, that's what happens (at least the first part). Oh, and the Reverend Pinker is also in the area. What? Yes, you heard me. Let's lard-up this already convoluted "plot" with yet another red herring. Pinker is not only pink in name but also in hue, so red herring is particularly appropriate in his case.

I'll finish this up here, since I've gone into way more detail than I intended. Hopefully it will be more than enough for you to judge for yourself, because you're going to have to make your own choice about this (as I hope you always do!). Yes, Ripped intrigued me, but in the end it just didn't get my bunny hopping. It wasn't that the story itself was so bad, but there were too many inexplicables for me - where I was left asking "what?". I don't like stories like that, but maybe you will like this one. Maybe this one for someone who knows a lot less about the Ripper murders than I do - but then that was the sole reason I opted to read it in the first place!

And no, I don't know who did it! No one does; that's why the true events are so fascinating for writers. You can make up your own explanation, as indeed I did in the Manuscript Found in a Lead Casket short story which is contained in the Poem y Granite collection.


Thursday, April 25, 2013

The Geneva Decision by Seeley James






Title: The Geneva Decision
Author: Seeley James
Publisher: Seeley James
Rating: warty

DISCLOSURE: Unlike the majority of reviews in this blog, I've neither bought this book nor borrowed it from the library. This is a "galley" copy ebook, supplied by Net Galley.

I'm not receiving (nor will I expect to receive or accept) remuneration of any kind for this review. Since this is a new novel, this review is shorter so as not to rob the writer of his story, but even so, it will probably still be more detailed than you'll typically find elsewhere!


First, a litany of nit-picking! I found this novel a bit inexplicable. The premise is that an outstanding Olympic soccer player, Pia Sabel, has given up her career at a young age (mid 20's apparently), to take over as the head of her father's security firm, Sabel (of course!), whose operatives use tranquilizer darts instead of regular guns, even though this always places them at a disadvantage because the darts have a really poor range!

Pia is incompetent. She's had no training, and was not even a field operative, yet she assigns herself to protect the life of a Swiss banker, and stands nowhere near him on this assignment! The two military-trained people who were with her on this op were evidently equally as incompetent, and Pia offered them no warning whatsoever even though she had spotted the assassin a significant time before he struck. She spotted him because even though he was a professional, he was sweating like an amateur! Thus, her charge is assassinated.

The assassin is taken into custody, but he escapes from the police. His assistant is let go by Pia, as she tries to take him in a soccer slide tackle (on asphalt! That's going to leave a mark! But it inexplicably doesn't!), instead of using her tranquilizer gun when she was well within range.

Shortly after, her team of three tracks down the assassin to a store in a back street, but instead of alerting the police, they enter the store and the assassin gets away again - and like in all the best TV shows, instead of giving chase, they stand around whining about how he's getting away! Pia is incompetent. Her team is incompetent.

Shortly afterwards, Pia is walking across a bridge when the assassin shows up out of nowhere, her team is nowhere near her, and she has to jump into the icy river to escape him, yet her phone still works fine afterwards. Hmm. I wish I had a phone like that!

The wife of the assassinated guy, Lena Marot, wants to hire Pia to find her husband's killer. She thinks Pia can do it because she was so good at soccer! She apparently fails to grasp that there's a massive difference between a trained soccer player anticipating the moves of her opponents on the pitch, and a fish-out-of-water trying to guess at what trained killers will do. They’re not in the same league!

And that's the problem with this novel: it's too much contradiction, too many fish out of too much water, too much over-superhero and not enough personality; Pia is so impossibly wonderful at everything she does (except her job, of course!) that instead of impressing me, she makes me want to vomit. She reminds me of the intentionally hilarious Peter Swift in the Tom Selleck movie, Her Alibi (which I highly recommend. It's a blast, and I'm not even a Tom Selleck fan, but in this, both he and his co-star Paulina Porizkova were perfect).

But just as in that movie, Tom Selleck's narration imbues his absurd private dick with extraordinary powers, we see the same thing here. Pia's parents were killed in front of her when she was only four years old, and I have to wonder whether Peter Swift was her real father, and if her mother wasn't that chronic over-achiever Honor Harrington, from the eponymous series by David Webber. That series started out excellently, but then went rapidly downhill as it became far more of a naval warfare info-dump (why - it was set in space!) far worse than anything Tom Clancy ever inflicted on us, than ever it was a stirring story of a woman fighting genderism in the military.

But I digress! The story goes to Cameroon, and back, and it continues to go back forth and back and forth all over the place without ever putting down any roots to give us something to root for. It goes to a lot of places, but 'engaging' isn’t one of those venues. Pia makes too many dumb decisions, which flatly contradicts the endless attempts to establish her as a paragon of physical perfection, superb skill, profuse poise, and men-defying feats of superhero stamina.

This endless perfection was too much to take in the first place, and when set against the dizzying number of escapes by the bad guys was completely undermined. The last line of the novel is "What's the matter, Dad? Afraid I'll find out who ordered my parents' assassination?" which seems really weird, but Pia was adopted after her parents were killed - killed apparently for no reason whatsoever other than to give her the tired cliché of chasing that muddied rainbow over a series of novels. She was adopted by her "Dad" but there's no explanation as to why he made her change her name instead of allowing her to preserve her family name, or why she didn’t change it back when she grew older.

I can’t get invested in this person at all. She's too "perfect" and simultaneously too incompetent. I have no faith in her, no trust in her, and really no interest in her or anything she's going to do. I think I am going to request no more of this kind of novel from Netgalley. I seem to have an awful lot of bad luck with them!


Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Tankborn by Karen Sandler






Title: Tankborn
Author: Karen Sandler
Publisher: Tu Books
Rating: worthy

I started out not liking Tankborn! It features a hellacious info-dump in first ten pages, yet despite this, too many questions remain unanswered. If it’s like this for the whole 372 pages methinks 'twill be a long day's journey into night. It immediately depressed me with all the hallmarks of a bad fantasy romance: the flawed girl (Kayla), the perfect boy (Devak) who comes to her rescue and it’s instadore! Guess where Kayla's assignment will be?!

There's far too much overly cute and unnecessary re-branding of things: 'bedroom' is, for no reason whatsoever, 'sleeproom', for example, but 'blankie' remains unaltered! Speaking of altering, the genetically engineered non-humans (GENs) are physically engineered for specific tasks, but not mentally engineered? Why? We're not invited to know.

Tankborn is set on a planet called Loka (as in Loca!) in a different solar system from ours. Apparently this is a colonized planet, but there's no explanation as to how or why humans are there (other than the obligatory Earth is polluted and globally warmed - yet people still live there). Colonizing planets light years from Earth makes little sense, given the expense and distances involved - not when Mars and Venus are right next door. The most glaring omission is an explanation as to why these colonizers breed low-caste people in tanks for menial work instead of building robots. This is a hugely hi-tech society, but there's not a single robot to be found.

Nor do we learn why the upper born overlords and all-around abusive slave drivers then trust these marginalized, ill-treated, ghetto-confined GENs (who happen to have darker skin) to raise their children! In the same way that "white" novels all-too-often exclude darker-skinned people, this novel evidently excludes light-skinned people. Again, the way to fix that errant pendulum is not to swing it all the way to the opposite side from where it offended, but to trap it firmly in the middle.

LOL sentence: "In the last week before her birthday, Kayla's monthly courses started with a vengeance." At first I thought this was some sort of training regimen to prepare her for her obligatory assignment - the lifelong task for which she was "bred"! But I very quickly realized that Sandler is talking about Kayla's menstrual cycle. Now why would GENs have periods? Did Sandler mean to say "curses' instead of "courses"?

Sandler seems not to understand genetics at all: there's talk about Kayla having elephant DNA because she's so strong. The fact is that most mammals have largely the same DNA - give or take some greater or lesser percentage. The differences that Sandler is talking about: Kayla's "frizzy hair", the variegated spotting of her skin, and even her upper body strength, do not have to come from her having been gene-spliced with DNA from other mammals.

The story begins with an encounter at the river which divides the GEN ghetto from the domain of the high-born and low-born (i.e. free people) community, some low-borns think it’s funny to throw rocks at Kayla's young tank-mate Jal, and a high-born comes to their rescue, so it’s instadore for Kayla even though it's painfully obvious (according to her thinking) that she's the worst person ever to live and who should probably just be put down like a rabid dog! Really.

I should say a word or two about the planet: there seem to be an awful lot of six-legged creatures living there, but none are really described. When Jal is down at the river, he's hunting toads, but they have six legs, so it's not clear if it's a large insect that happens to look like a toad, or something that looks like a toad and happens to have six legs! It doesn't specify what they're going to do with these "toads". I suspect it's for food, but there's no talk about how the human digestive system can even cope with these alien proteins. Rest assured, it's not as simple as most sci-fi shows make you believe.

There's also talk of several deadly viral outbreaks, but it's not clear where the viruses are supposed to have come from. They can't have come from Loka, because the viruses there would have evolved no way of infecting an alien physiology, which is what humans would have in comparison with the locals, yet this seems to be the implication.

Evidently there are no fish on Loka, only critters with six legs, and those are not very large, except for one "spider" which is several feet tall. Again, a bit of knowledge of biology here (which typical Americans sorely lack, unfortunately, and Sandler's degrees in math and physics don't help!) would have been useful. Having a three foot tall spider is not completely out of the realm of possibility: Earth had some disturbingly large insects and other such fauna many millions of years ago, but if insects and spiders on Loka have a physiology anything at all like those on Earth, they have to get oxygen to their cells somehow, and the bigger they grow, the harder this is to do, unless the atmosphere is very rich in oxygen, which would bring its own set of issues. Let's just say that the colonists probably shouldn't have so many incinerators going!

I have to wonder how they colonists got there - not the physical means (although that, too, is a problem), but if it was a privately sponsored expedition for the very rich, how come there are so many low-borns? If they have GENs to be slaves, why do they need any lowlifes? Er... low-borns? Why - if they have left Earth because of pollution and such, do they not religiously recycle?! If it wasn't a privately funded expedition, then why is there this shameful caste system in place? Again, no answers.

But the novel picks up a bit with the upcoming Day of Assignment: the evening before, Kayla gets a special delivery of a secret package which she's expected to smuggle over to the 'born community. Why? I have no idea. It would be the easiest thing in the world to simply throw or catapult the thing over the river (or maybe ask Jason born to take it?!). But totally out of the blue, Kayla is selected to transport this tiny package, and she unaccountably decides she'll do it despite the massive risk of her being brain-wiped if she's caught - and she's searched often enough that the risk of being caught is very high.

So, a few problems with this so far, but enough interest in where it's going to keep me going despite all these irritating issues! Besides, I love the name "Karen Sandler" - it will make a great character name in some novel or other! Hey! I saw it first!

She's taken across the river over the one bridge and left to find her own way to her new owners, where her assignment is to babysit some old fogy. She's treated like crap until she actually gets to the place where she is to work - taking care of an old man, who welcomes her warmly, and treats her with great respect, and he doesn't even ask her to wear gloves before she touches him. And guess who his great grandson is? Yep - Devak!! Surprise! Not.

Devak - who went out of his way to help her at the river - is a rather more bigoted and thoughtless guy here. There's no explanation for this - just as there's no explanation for why a specially bred tank-born with really strong arms is sent to play nursemaid to an old guy. It's possible, given what we learn about this guy, that he engineered this whole thing, so that helps. Devak, under the tutelage of his grandfather, is at least trying to be nice to the jiks. He finds her secret chip when it falls out of her mattress, but he assumes it belonged to the previous resident of the shack in which she is to stay, and he gives it to his great grandfather Zul, the guy Kayla is taking care of but Zul gives it right back to Kayla when Devak isn't looking!

Kayla happens to meet another GEN on the streets who asks her for the chip she has, but before she can decide if he should give it to him (what's to decide? Get rid of it! She's so worried about it being in her possession, and now she's hesitating?!). But then the moron who threw rocks at her at the start of the story gets into an accident right in front of her; she saves his life and he bitches at her for touching his car! I sincerely hope he isn't going to be the third leg in some pain in the ass triangle.

But we learn that not only is Kayla mysteriously being recruited as a messenger, her friend from the ghetto, Mishalla is also recruited. She gets a brain upload, and she learns by accident that children are being kidnapped and routed through her crèche in some bizarre plan to steal land from the low-borns. So the story remains acceptably interesting so far, although it has issues and seems to be moving a bit slowly.

I've finished this one now, and I have to say I'm a bit disappointed but I'm still willing to rate it worthy. The story becomes a bit muddied and weak at the end. The weakness comes from the revelation that the original DNA brought from Earth is running out so they can't make any more GENs? What? DNA is running out on a planet where every GEN, lowborn, and trueborn is stuffed with it? This makes no sense at all, but it's used as the pretext for the plot which is that lowborns are being abducted from their families and "converted" to GENs. This is the biggest weakness in the story because I can't buy this at all. I can't buy that they don't have robots, and even setting that aside, I can't buy that they're running out of DNA.

Props to Sandler for not giving a trite ending, but shame on her for not bringing more justice to her finale! The ending was unsatisfying not because it didn't have a happily ever after ending (which it didn't), but because justice wasn't served. The ending unfortunately screams sequel, but I can't rally myself to want to read it. Who knows, maybe I'll one day find myself enmeshed in a book crisis and be desperately searching for something to read, and be forced to give it a chance, but other than that, I'm done with this series. The book was acceptable, but not edge-of-seat tell-me-what-happens-next-or-the-adorable-darling-puppy-gets-it gripping!


Monday, April 22, 2013

Doctor Who: Prisoners of Time by by Scott & David Tipton, Art by Simon Fraser, Color by Gary Caldwell






COMIC BOOK REVIEW!

Title: Doctor Who: Prisoners of Time
Author: Scott & David Tipton
Art: Simon Fraser
Color: Gary Caldwell
Publisher: IDW Publishing
Rating: WORTHY!

DISCLOSURE: Unlike the majority of reviews in this blog, I neither bought this book nor borrowed it from the library. This is a "galley" copy ebook, supplied by Net Galley, and is available now.

I'm not receiving (nor will I expect to receive or accept) remuneration of any kind for this review.


This is an excellent comic about Doctor Who in celebration of the fiftieth anniversary this year, which the current season on TV is somehow failing to get into. Hopefully this will change in the second half of the season, as we approach closer to the month and date of the anniversary. The comic I had a chance to read is divided into three chapters of 22 pages each, one chapter for each of the very first three doctors, portrayed on TV by William Hartnell (died 1975), Patrick Troughton (died 1987), and Jon Pertwee (died 1996). Even Richard Hurndall, who stood in for Hartnell in 1983's The Five Doctors is no longer with us.

That, I'm afraid, is a huge problem for TV. Once a series is half a century old, it’s inevitable that many of the original actors have died, or grown so old that they cannot reasonably portray the characters we remember so fondly, but this is no problem for this comic book. We can once again enjoy the people we loved and grew up with as fresh and vital as they ever were, and in new adventures!

The artwork in this comic is standard comic book art, but the renditions of the Doctors are remarkably reminiscent of the actors who played them, even down to facial expressions and dialog. Clearly this comic was done by people who know and love the show as well as I do - if not better. Chapter one, for example, was very much William Hartnell, and I'd actually forgotten how he kept misstating Ian Chesterton's name! But here he is back to life, spouting his exasperated and dramatic catch-phrases! It was nice to see a strong scientific element get some mention in the story, too (they hang out with Thomas Huxley in 1868), but I wasn't quite as impressed by the drawing of his companions. They're still better than anything I could manage, I freely admit, but not quite as captivating as the Doctor himself was.

This chapter takes place after his granddaughter, Susan has left the TARDIS and has been replaced by Vicki, who joins Barbara Wright (played on TV by Jacqueline Hill, sadly also no longer with us) and Ian (played on TV by William Russell). They face the Zarbi, a race of ant-like beings the size of Great Danes, which are harmless unless taken over by an evilly-inclined controlling agency as they are here, by an octopus-like creature called The Animus and invading the London underground. On TV, we first met these creatures in season 2, ep 5 of the classic Doctor Who series back in the sixties, in The Web Planet. The Zarbi are freed when Ian runs over The Animus with one of the trains! Unfortunately, right then, all three of the Doc's companions disappear!

In Chapter 2, we find ourselves with Patrick Troughton's portrayal of The Doc, traveling with Zöe and the feisty, kilt-wearing Jamie McCrimmond, a highlander from the mid-eighteenth century, both of which are drawn much better than the first doctor's companions. Jaime was played on TV by Fraser Hines, and he appeared in more episodes of Doctor Who than any other companion - and more episodes than most of the doctors for that matter! The three of them materialize in a store which specializes in selling police boxes! They have models in all shapes, sizes, and colors, so The Doc's TARDIS fits right in. When they step out of the store, they're in a mall, which happens to be one of the greatest trading posts in the galaxy, but it’s also a haven of black-market activity. I loved the one frame where The Doc is standing outside a hat store and there's a fez in the window, and then the next frame is a close up of The Doc angled so that it looks like he's actually wearing the fez! lol!

Some of this activity is slave-trading, and The Doc decides he's going to put an end to that! They follow the alien traders, who look rather like alligators, back to their store, where one of them takes an interest in Jamie, observing that he's from the past and therefore valuable. As the three time travelers meander into a bicycle shop (where one bicycle looks remarkably like the bikes from the TV series The Prisoner!), Jamie is kidnapped by the aliens and disappears. Fortunately, the Doc, in true second doctor fashion, has anticipated this, and has put a tracking device on him! He and Zöe trail him to an auction house, where slaves are being auctioned off to the highest bidder. The Doc's tracker leads them straight to Jamie, where they find many slaves in holding pens. They free all of them, but once again, right as their adventure reaches a successful conclusion, The Doc's companions disappear. Where the heck are they going? Who is taking them? Well, I guess we know it's not Who!

Chapter three is the third incarnation of the Doctor. He's hanging out with his usual companions, Sarah Jane Smith (played on TV by Elisabeth Sladen) and Liz Shaw (played on TV by Caroline John). Both of these actors are sadly no longer with us. The problem for this doctor is Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart's erratic behavior. Stewart was played on TV by Nicholas Courtney, now also deceased. Courtney had to be one of the few people in Doctor Who who had actually fulfilled in real life the role he played on screen, in that he actually was in the British army for a while! The Doc discovers that Lethbridge-Stewart is being controlled by the Remorax, by means of a small fish-like creature in his throat. Once that's removed, he returns to his usual self, but he, along with The Doc's other two companions is abducted by a strange man in a hooded costume. So now we have an idea of who's behind it, but we still know nothing of exactly who this person is, or why he's doing this.

And that's all we get! I hate this! Now I'll go insane trying to figure out what happens next until I can get my hands on volume two of this series! But what a joy to see a series celebrate the Doctor's companions? I can hardly wait for volume 2.

If you're neither a fan of Doctor Who, nor a fan of comic books, then this is probably not for you, but if you're even mildly into either of them, I recommend this series based on this opening salvo. It’s fun, it’s well done, it’s a wonderful trip down the Doctor Who memory lane. I don’t know if this will ever become a collector's item, but it's about time(!) someone did something for the 50th anniversary, and I'm glad it was this! I'm definitely going to be looking for these coming on sale. Not for myself, of course, but for my kids...Ahem!


Sunday, April 21, 2013

The Icarus Girl by Helen Oyeyemi






Title: The Icarus Girl
Author: Helen Oyeyemi
Publisher: Doubleday
Rating: Worthy!

Helen Oyeyemi (is that an awesome name or what?!) was only eighteen when she wrote this novel. I've seen no word as to why a novel so closely tied to Africa has a title taken from Greek mythology! The story begins with Jessamy Harrison hiding in a cupboard. Her mother finally locates her and asks her how she would like to go to Nigeria for a vacation, and off they go to visit her mum's family. Jess feels just as alienated in Nigeria as she did in England, but things change for her.

Two things happen in Nigeria other than what the story purports to relate. One is Oyeyemi's annoying use of Nigerian words to 'describe' things without actually describing the thing - so we learn nothing of the Yoruba language or of Nigeria! I don’t know why authors do this! There's no glossary, but at least there's no prologue, so that kinda balances out!

The other thing is that Jess's grandfather is very patriarchal and condescending towards women. They’re more like servants than fellow human beings. He resents Jess's mom for not doing what he expected of her, which was that she would go to med school. Instead she went the English language route and became a writer. Despite this, Jess takes a liking to him. I don't know what bearing Jess's mom's history has on this story if any.

At one point, Jess's skin is described thus; "..milky coffee-colored...". I've seen someone complain about the use of foodstuffs (chocolate, coffee) to describe dark skin coloring. I don’t understand this complaint! Are we being accused of cannibalism? The people who complain about this seem not to grasp that things have more than one attribute. Coffee, for example, is a drink, a bean, a bush, and it's also a color. When people use the term to describe a person's skin, they aren't comparing that person with a beverage, or a seed, or a plant! What are we supposed to do? Say the person was as brown as dirt?! Describe them as the color of feces? Given that choice, I sure know which I'd rather be compared with! Having said that, there is always room for more thought on the part of the writer; perhaps some weight should be given to comparing a character's attributes with something which is much more personal to the character or their history.

One day, Jess notices a faint light in a building in her grandfather's compound which shouldn’t be there. She's been told the building used to be the boys (servant's) quarters but is no longer in use. Slavery in Africa! Jess, of course, has to investigate and she finds the place in complete disuse and covered in dust, but in one place in this dust is written 'HEllO JEssY', which causes her to feel distinctly uncomfortable, since this is the second time since she's been in Nigeria that she's been called something she's not used to. Her grandfather called her by her Nigerian name, Wuraola, when he first met her. I found it intriguing that both times the 'hello Jessy' term is used, the letters which are in lower case are the twin letters in each word.

Later, Jess meets Titiola, evidently the girl who wrote her name in the dust. The first few things she says are merely repetitions of what Jess says to her, but later Jess is drawn to her grandfather's locked study, where she finds the door unaccountably open and TillyTilly (as Jess has now dubbed her) waiting inside for her. The two of them look at some of his books, by candle-light - candles TillyTilly has apparently stolen from the house. Later, Jess finds a copy of Louisa May Alcott's Little Women by her bed with HEllO JEssY written in it. Evidently it's a gift from her new friend.

I like Jess already. She has a peculiar way of looking at life that actually comports with my own in many regards, and she loves books! I particularly loved her when I found that she likes to annotate the books she reads with her own improvements added in pencil to the original text! I don’t do this, but I do think this at times! So now Oyeyemi has me invested in her character, and I will never forgive her if she lets harm befall young Jess!

One day TillyTilly shows up and asks Jess to go to the local amusement park with her, except that it’s not so local when you have to walk there. Since it’s Sunday, the park is closed, but TillyTilly somehow makes the padlocked gate open and they spend a fun time in there playing until the electricity shuts off, whereupon TillyTilly suggests that Jess go home. She does, and gets into a bit of trouble from her folks for disappearing. Soon - surprisingly soon - it’s time for Jess to return to England. She's supposedly been in Nigeria for a month, but the way the story was told made it seem like it was only a week or so.

Back in England, school starts up again and Jess starts having her usual problems with people there. She has no real friends and resents the behavior of some of her class-mates. It’s almost like Jess is an actor, trying to perform in a certain way to fit in with the production called "day to day life", but her fellow actors are so average that she really can’t see how the performance will rise to the height it should be at, and all-too-often (once-per-week according to Jess's own calculations, on average), Jess evidently has a breakdown because of this, whereupon she doubles over, and screams and screams. This naturally causes considerable consternation, but no one seems to know what to do about it. The doctors can find nothing physically wrong with her and Jess doesn’t feel able to communicate anything of utility on this problem to her parents.

On the subject of her parents, I'm concerned that they don’t appear to engage Jess in any real way at all. It seems like Jess is left to her own devices way too often, which makes her a very lonely child. Her mother, at the start of the story, asks about her going out to play with the neighbor kids, but Jess lies about it, claiming that she's been out when she's done nothing save sit in the cupboard all afternoon! Her mother fails her in not pursuing this. Jess also feels like she feels she's not real at least some of the time. Is this because her parents fail to treat her as though she's really there? She often complains to herself about not being seen. Jess has to remind herself who she is, where she is, how old she is, as though she has to regularly verify and validate her own existence - or she’ll disappear or something?

This kind of thing made me wonder if taking her to Nigeria, removing her from a place she at least had some sort of security in (if only from its familiarity) and had some attachment to, to another place where although in some ways she would fit in, she also felt like a fish out of water because it was so alien in comparison with what she was used to. So now we’re left wondering, for the present, whether Jess is going to have a breakdown. And who is this Titiola, who has given her so much, but has never been seen by any other person? Is she real? Is she an imaginary friend? How will Jess cope now that she's not only had the shock of being transposed to Nigeria for a month, but she's also been wrenched back from that, leaving her only friend behind? I'm hooked!

There's an interesting play in duality and dissection running through the story so far. Jess's parents are a pair, but one is black and the other white. Jess is kind of straddled between two nations, England and Nigeria. She calls her best friend by the same name twice: TillyTilly; clearly there's a movement towards something here, so I'm anxious to see where that leads!

So TillyTilly turns up at Jess's house claiming her parents have moved there, which is weird in itself. This happens after Jess got into a fight at school after being bullied by one of the other girls. I seriously hope this kind of thing isn't tolerated in British schools. TillyTilly knows where this bully girl lives and she takes Jess into the house - but they're invisible - so even though the girl and her mum are home, they can’t see Jess and TillyTilly. They learn that the bully girl wets the bed and is beaten by her mum.

Later, when Jess's parents go out and a babysitter comes over to sit with Jess and her cousin Dulcie, who is very full of herself, TillyTilly shows up in sight of the babysitter and Dulcie, takes Jess down through the stairs into the ground underneath the house! Lidia the babysitter rationalizes this into Jess ducking down at the top of the stairs, and hiding. When Jess meets with Tilly Tilly at another time in the park, Jess makes the startling realization that no one but she can actually see TillyTilly, but this makes her no less real.

Jess is taken on a visit to a psychiatrist or psychologist, Dr. McKenzie, about which she's quite apprehensive (and against which TillyTilly is dead-set), but Jess ends up having a positive experience, and she bonds a bit with the psychologist's daughter Siobhan ("Shivs"), although where the heck one would find a psychologist who invites his client into his home and let's her run around the house is a bit of a mystery.

At slightly over 50% into the novel, things begin to crystallize. I should have known something weird was going to happen when I read this sentence: "...small and curly blond in much the same way as Dr. McKenzie was tall and red." Now what does that mean?!

Jess becomes somewhat ill at one point (and please take note that I'm recalling this from a less than perfect memory, so I may not have all of these events in exact chronological order!). TillyTilly visits her and tells Jess that she is a twin, but her twin sister Fern died in the womb before she could be birthed. TillyTilly tells Jess that now she is her twin. Jess raises this lost twin issue with her mother who now thinks Jess is somehow possessed by some African evil. Jess ends up cutting out pictures of twins (or of people who look alike) from school library books and gets into trouble over that. TillyTilly declares to Jess that she's going to "get" Miss Patel (Jess's teacher) for this, which puts Jess into a bit of a panic.

This starts Tilly-Tilly on a vengeance drive. She gets Jess's father, making him so tired that he can hardly function. She gets Shivs and makes her fall down the stairs. She survives the fall but we learn nothing of her fate. She starts swapping bodies with Jess, so that TillyTilly is in Jess's body and Jess becomes some sort of airy-fairy which has little substance. Finally, Jess is taken back to Nigeria to celebrate her ninth birthday, and there, after a car accident, she confronts TillyTilly on the dream plan and defeats her.

I recommend this book! It's cool and fun and interesting.


Friday, April 19, 2013

Huntress by Malinda Lo






Title: Huntress
Author: Malinda Lo
Publisher: Little Brown
Rating: worthy

Huntress promises, at first blush, to be a better than Ash. It begins with a vision experienced by Taisin (which my spellchecker wants to change to raisin, lol!), of another girl in her year at the sage's school, a girl called Kaede, getting into a boat on an icy shore and rowing towards an ice castle across the water. In these times, there is a blight on the land. It's cold; there's very little sunshine, and crops are dying. People are starving.

There comes an invitation from the fairy kingdom for a representative from the human world to meet their queen. Despite a longstanding treaty between the two peoples, there has never been any contact between them since the treaty. The king himself cannot undertake this journey because of the perilous condition of his kingdom, so his son is chosen to go. Because of her vision, which has been confirmed by other means, Taisin must also go, and because her vision involved Kaede, she, too, must go. Three royal guards, one of whom is a woman, make up the party of six who undertake this journey. It's a complete mystery why they do not send more guards. The prince, a rather lackluster and feeble royal pain reminiscent of the royal dishrag Prince Kai in Cinder asked that they limit the party, the ostensible reason being that they want to undertake the journey in secret, but undertake is what they do as their number is cut in half when they travel in the forest.

Lo skirts dangerously with instadore (my term for "instalove", a word which I dislike because it's never actually about love) between the two main protagonists. It stays just this side of absurdity, but flirts dangerously with it. There is no real attraction between the two main protagonists in any meaningful sense, only an inexplicable compulsion, as though they aren't in control of their feelings, which is a huge turn-off if you ask me. It's like getting drunk and having sex and then someone crying rape. Well duhh! These two girls have spent absolutely no time together in any capacity prior to this journey, and they barely know who each other is, so it's really hard to accept this acutely focused attraction they suddenly develop, and Lo's prose describing it is rather too Harlequin for my taste. It comes off very badly when compared with her awesome romance in Ash for my money.

Having bitched about that, the story itself is pretty good, and made me want to find out what's happening on the next page. Lo relates the tale in the third person, but alternating subtly between the PoV of Taisin, and that of Kaede. A note here about pronunciation. I've already addressed this bit of silliness in my review of Ash. In that novel there was no guide to names, whereas Huntress does feature one at the front of the book, but it makes as little sense as the names in Ash did! For example, in Ash, the name Kaisa is pronounced Ky-sa, but in this novel, Taisin is pronounced Tay-sin - pretty much as in Mike Tyson! Who knows, maybe the pronunciations have changed in the couple of hundred years between the two novels - or maybe Lo is just annoyingly whimsical. Kaede is pronounced Kay-dee FYI, which does make a bit more sense.

As they approach a certain village, tales of a demon child begin to grow, until at last, Taisin can stand it no longer. She insists that her party do not avoid this village, and when they arrive there, she purposefully seeks out the child, only to find it's possessed by an ugly demon. Kaede saves Taisin's life by stabbing it with her iron knife, but then it vanishes and Kaede's knife is stuck into a dead baby.

The push on with the journey until the reach Shae's home town, where they find a thoroughly weird "monster" the like of which they've never seen before. It's dead, and the villagers are about to bury it as the travelers arrive there. it's blindfolded and has a stone in its mouth so that if it rises from the grave it cannot find anyone, and cannot lure them away with whisperings! Yeah - and it can't spit out the stone and tear off the blindfold, either...!

After a day or so of rest and (relative) relaxation, enjoying some good food, the team of six push on, heading for the part of the map which is blank! In fact, it's so blank that it doesn't even say "here there be monsters" even though there are actually monsters there! They find as they press deeper into the forest that there are whisperings on the night (why not in the day is a mystery), and one of their party, Tali, is lured from the camp and is found dead, with no identifiable means of execution visible anywhere. From that point onwards, Taisin wises up, decides to protect her fellow travelers each night by casting a spell around the camp. Unlike the wizards in Patricia Wrede's Thirteenth Child series, Taisin can't cast this kind of protective spell while they travel. This ritual leads to rapid heartbeats in Kaede as Taisin has to touch each of the party on their chest as she completes the circle.

As the journey in the bleeding cold and fatiguing wet continues, the party finds itself stalked by wolves, and as usual the wolves are portrayed as evil which is an awful stereotype to perpetuate. One night the wolves launch an attack and because Prince Con perhaps he has that name advisedly?) failed to bring along sufficient protection, another of their party is savaged to death by the wolves and the girl, Shae (which is actually pronounced Shay believe it or not) is mauled so badly that they cannot continue. Fortunately a "greenwitch" ex machina shows up and they're able to stay with her for a couple of days to recover. This greenwitch (no word on whether she's actually from Greenwich, but they do have a mean time!) also happens to be a skilled healer, but Shae cannot continue with them which breaks Prince Con's heart because he was falling in lurve with her - again for no apparent reason. It broke my heart, too, because she was my favorite character!

So they continue the journey and after Kaede saves Taisin's life yet again in the river crossing, they encounter the Xi (of course, pronounced she, as in sheesh!). From that point they are escorted to the fairy city, Taninli (TAN-in-LEE) on Midsummer's eve. Taisin and Kaede have a hot and heavy moment, but then they're escorted to meet the fairy queen.

The upshot of this is that the fairy queen wants them to kill her daughter Elowen who is at the root of the blight. She's capturing fairies and sucking them dry of life force to make herself stronger, and she's trying to invent an army of half-breeds to destroy the fairy queen and take over as ruler of both the fairies and the humans. Only a human can kill her because Elowen is a half-breed human-fairy, so the three of them set off on a tedious journey over the raw ice until they reach the ice castle of Elowen, whereupon Con the wimp waste of time promptly breaks his leg, and Taisin becomes a limp rag, weakened by Elowen's psychic invasions during the journey, so Kaede is the only one who can go kill her with her iron knife, which she does. It ought to have ended there, but inexplicably, it doesn't. Lo tacks on a really bad extra ending which is just nonsensical, and the actual ending sucks weiners.

How anyone can rate this is a great example of a feminist-leaning novel is a mystery to me. I saw no reason to perceive this as a great example of feminism or of how a decent lesbian story should be told. But it is a story about two lesbians, and it was okay as such.

However, I am prepared to rate this as worthy with the exception of the ending! I don't know how Lo could have slipped so badly after her outstanding ending in Ash, but the bulk of the story - with a bit of a meh! for the instadore-wannabe - is really rather good. Even the anticlimactic non-fight between Kaede and Elowen is acceptable. It's just the last 20 pages or so (part five) which is a waste of time. Dud only knows why she wrote that tacky tack-on. Just don't read that, imagine the romantic and happy ending of your choice, and you'll like this as much as I did before I read the last 20 pages!