Death of a Dreamer by MC Beaton

Rating: WARTY!

"When an ailing woman is found poisoned after a lovers’ quarrel, it’s up to constable Hamish Macbeth to solve the suspicious case!" Hamish Macbeth, seriously? I wouldn't read this based on the stupid name alone. Could we be any more condescending to the Scots? And why is a constable in charge of such a serious investigation? There are no detectives available? Or is the constable brilliant and the detectives useless? In which case why is Macbeth still a constable? Yawn.

Agatha Raisin and the Quiche of Death by Marion Chesney Gibbons aka MC Beaton

Rating: WARTY!

I bought this book - which is part of a series about a British amateur detective named Agatha Raisin - based on my love of the British TV series derived from it. Normally I would not give a novel like this or a series like this the time of day and I was interested only because the TV show was so enjoyable. Sadly, the book isn't quite the same.

We expect this. You can't translate a book, no matter how loved it is, directly into a screen format without losing things and changing things, and even adding things, but the discrepancy between the delightfully lush grape of a TV detective and the sad Raisin of the book was quite startling. The Agatha of the TV show was, unfortunately, but predictably younger (by a decade) and much more pleasant. The Agatha of the novel is rather obnoxious at times. There's no reason at all why an actor of similar age could not have been hired, but TV and movies favor youth (or the appearance of it) over anything else, it seems.

I had what I call my 'robot reader' read this ebook to me. It's actually Apple's Voice Over technology, and it does a pretty decent job when you figure out how to use it wisely (the trick is never to turn it on until you are actually in the ebook, and to turn it off before you exit the ebook!), but this thing has no idea of a 'quiche' so it gets egg on its face! Naturally that word was used effusively, since someone died after eating one, but the robot reader pronounces it like it rhymes with swish, and like the word begins with 'kw'. It amused the hell out of me every time I heard it. We take our joys in life where we can, right? Otherwise it would be miserable and we'd probably all end-up being like the Agatha of the book instead of the Agatha of the TV series.

Anyways, Agatha has retired from her job running a PR firm in London, and moved to a small village named Carsley in the English Cotswolds region. Of course it's one of those tiny places where, ridiculously, the murder rate rivals Detroit or some major city. It's absurd, yes, and this is only one reason I'd never follow a series like this.

So the village has a quiche competition. Agatha cheats and buys a quiche at a store out of town and enters it as her own creation. She's miffed when she doesn't win and considers the contest rigged. She tells the organizer she doesn't want her quiche and requests they throw it away, but the organizer of the contest - the guy she doesn't like - takes it home and dies of poisoning after eating a piece. Naturally, she's a suspect and so gets dragged into the investigation.

The story kept going off at irrelevant tangents and was consequently boring, plus I didn't like Agatha at all. I gave up on it before I'd listened to very much and cannot commend it as a worthy read. I'm done with this series, and with this author.