The Fifth Day of Christmas

Rating: WARTY!

So today we're looking at five books I've read in the last couple of months - or tried to anyway. Not a one of them pleased me! First up is:

Fairy Metal Thunder by JL Bryan

This started out well enough except that the idiot main character was clueless. He didn't seem to exist beyond his evidently unrequited yearning for another character, which not only made him creepy, it also made him very shallow frankly. And if that's all he is, it doesn't endear me to him at all. It was far too YA for my taste.

The story then abruptly switched from being a tale about a garage band to being one about fairies. At least the author had the guts to call 'em what they are instead of trying to hide their embarrassment under this pussy-footing chickenshit 'fae' euphemism. But the fairy world was boringly trope and less than thrilling. When this idiot main character, despite multiple warnings, stole magical fairy instruments for no apparent reason and without any establishment of any credible motive, it not only made no sense, but it also made him seem like a jerk, and a bigger loser than he already was. It was at that point that I just went off the story irretrievably and DNF'd it. I can't commend it based on what I read.

It Ain't Flat by Karl Beckstrand

I've had such mixed luck with this author that I think this is the last of his efforts that I shall try reading, and this was another failure. The book is ridiculously short, and appallingly formatted, since it went through the Amazon Kindle conversion process and ended up - predictably so, for anything that's not the plainest vanilla text - as kindling. Amazon sucks and so does its Kindle system which is yet another reason I will have nothing to do with those assholes.

As far as this "book" is concerned, all it was was a rhyming list of all the nations of the world - intended, supposedly, to be a way of memorizing them. Why anyone would want to do that, I do not know, but this isn't the best way to do it, and it has nothing whatsoever to do with flatness or otherwise of the globe and the formatting was so bad that it was barely readable, so I can't commend this - not even a little bit.

Wizard in a Witchy World by Jamie McFarlane

This Jim Butcher wannabe was far too trope for my taste and involved such a hail of antagonism and violence that it turned me off from the beginning. I'm no fan of Jim Butcher's wizard series by any stretch of the imagination, although I loved his Alera Furies pentalogy, so anything that smacks of that bullshit is a non-starter for me and this did! This idea of 'witch councils' and territories and so on just makes me laugh out loud. It's so tired, and so were the magical practices described here. And what the fuck is up with the idea that if you're a guy you're a wizard, but if you're female, you're a witch? I hated that genderist horseshit in Harry Potter, and it's no less detestable here. There's nothing new in this book, and it bored me. I DNF'd it in short order and I cannot commend it based on what I did read.

The Origins of Heartbreak by Cara Malone

This is the start of a loosely connected series of stand-alones called "Lakeside Hospital" which is nowhere near as bad as an actual series, but I still could not get with this, because the writing was really poor in a variety of ways.

The story is about a woman who is training to be a a paramedic and her lesbian crush who is training to be a doctor. I liked the idea of this which is what drew me in, but when I started seeing how poorly it was written I decided enough is enough. At one point, for example, I read: "...then she’d walk from the hospital to campus and spent the rest of the morning" Wrong verb tense: it needed 'Spend'. Next I came across this: "...but he died shortly thereafter...." Who talks like that? Nobody! Later, I read, "...dic-in-training would cross paths again, at least not until Megan stared her rotations...." 'Started' was needed there.

I don't think anyone knows better than I how a misspelled word or a bad grammar choice, or an oddball bizarre mistake can crop up in your text. When you're a one-person operation, it's easy, and I don't normally care about such mistakes, but when there is a high frequency, and a consistency to them, it makes me think the author doesn't care either, and I lose faith in them. Those issues were not the only ones though. I read, for example, when one character had a moment of vulnerability, the other character was trying to "...work up the courage to kiss Megan while they were sitting alone on that bench." Is the author having one of her two main characters seriously take advantage of a person in a moment of insecurity and weakness? That's really bad and very creepy and anti-romantic.

Another error arose from the author pushing her story so much that she apparently forgot it's supposed to be set in a real (if fictional) world where things are happening and time is passing. I read, "In the five minutes or so that they were alone together...." Now this five minutes was apparently all the time it took to do a complete autopsy in this fictional world! Sorry but no! A real autopsy tales an hour or so. Maybe a bit shorter, often longer, and there's no way in hell its going to get done in five minutes no matter how experienced the coroner is! This was seriously bad writing. Later I read, "After a few minutes, during which she noted gratefully that no tears were threatening to rise in her throat...." Nope. Tears come from tear ducts, not from the throat. Maybe something was coming from her throat: difficulty swallowing, dryness, something, but never tears. That's just sloppy writing.

So the problem with this was that I had the impression that the author was so intent upon getting these two characters into bed that she honestly didn't care how unrealistically she achieved that, and that she really wasn't interested much in creating a story around then or having them behave naturally, or having the romance arise organically from the relationship. That's why I DNF'd this and why I won't be reading any more of this author's work.

Magenta Mine by Janet Elizabeth Henderson

I am honestly at a loss as to how this novel ever got onto my reading list. Seriously. I began reading it and halted with a screech at four percent. The screech was from my mouth when I read this obnoxious part where Harry is quite literally harassing Magenta. There's no other word for it. She works, of course, in a lingerie shop despite this being - from what we've read of her character to that point - the very last place she'd ever work.

She's previously made it clear she has zero interest in him. Another woman, Harry's trusted business partner, has warned him off bugging her, yet he goes right into the store and starts trying to get her to date him despite having been rebuffed before. She clearly tells him no, and does it no less than four times. Then the idiot author has her hand Harry some lingerie to sort, "as long as he's there." Seriously? He takes a look at one of the thongs and says to Magenta, the girl who had just made it clear she wants nothing to do with him, "These would look good on you."

It's fucking obnoxious and this author needs to be thoroughly ashamed, if not thoroughly shamed for writing this abusive trash. I not only do not commend this, I actively condemn it.

Chengli and the Silk Road Caravan by Hildi Kang

Rating: WARTY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

The were multiple problems with this novel which is why I can't commend it as a worthy read. The basic story sounded quite engrossing: Chengli Chau is a 13-year-old orphan who lives in Changan, in seventh century China. He feels a call to join a caravan traveling the old silk road across the desert from one city to another where he might discover what happened to his father (which he never really does), and he begins learning the ropes - literally, since one of his duties is making sure packs are tied securely on camels.

During the course of the novel he encounters problems, hardship, thievery, a bandit raid, and a kidnapped Chinese princess. And that was one of the problems with this relatively short (~200 pages) story: there was far too much going on! Naturally, no one wants to read a tedious documentary about an uneventful caravan journey even though, undoubtedly, most of them had little out of the ordinary happen to them from one trip to the next. But on this journey, it was like everything, including the kitchen sink (if they had such a thing back then!) was thrown at this poor boy, and his life on this trip was one long torturous trial. It became tedious to read of these endless miseries with no leavening whatsoever in between.

Naturally an author wants to spice-up a story, but the trip itself would have been adventure enough without all the added drama. It felt like too much - like overkill and as such felt unnatural - not like an organic story. The boy was constantly abused and threatened with having his head cut-off maybe a half-dozen times. It felt unnatural.

The other side of this coin is that the book description promises us that we can "experience the sights, sounds, and smells of this fabled desert route," but we really don't get a whole heck of a lot of that. There was a lot that could have been learned here of history, but all we did learn was of hardship. There was a lot more to discover, but we were not allowed the opportunity: such as of the kinds of things that were transported, the kinds of people who made up the caravan, the joys some must have felt, traveling and pursuing their calling.

But we really got none of that, and really, no smells! Sights, yes, sounds, some, but that was about it. I got no real sense of what it was like to travel and live in the desert. There was little to nothing that conveyed the beauty of the dunes, the heat of the day, the cold of the night, the mirages. There wasn't a word about desert wildlife or the night sky, or of navigating the endless sand. It felt barren and empty, more like a sketch of a story than a real story.

The description told us that Chengli was called to the desert, but once he began the journey we got none of that. His desert bond disappeared and we heard virtually nothing of it after that. He exhibited no calling whatsoever; no joy of the desert or of the sand. We got no feelings that he might have had of the desert wind in his hair or the spices it carried assaulting his nostrils. It fell completely flat because of the endless trials and pains he endured. There really was no joy in this story.

On top of all this, the book was poorly put together, too. There is no chaptering. It's one, long, continuous, 200 page story! One chapter! No illustrations. And so we can jump several days or more from one paragraph to the next which makes the story extremely choppy, and it robs us of any real sense of a long passage of time. As well as all that, we get false promises! We get, for example, at one point, a promise of the giant waterwheels, at an upcoming city, and then those water wheels are never mentioned again. The book was seriously in need of a competent book editor.

This had the potential to be a fun and engaging story for young kids, but for all the reasons I mentioned it was not and I can't commend it as a worthy read. Young kids deserve better than this.

The Gratitude Car by Isabelle Child, Vanity Olaires, Lana Mol

Rating: WARTY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This work is translated from the original Spanish, I assume, and I think it lost something in the translation. Curiously this did not appear to be a language issue! I would have loved to have seen the original version, but all I get is the ebook version which unfortunately too often leaves something to be desired. I'm not Spanish speaker by any means, but I feel I understand enough of it that - in a children's book like this - I could probably have got more out of the original than I did out of this.

I enjoyed the sentiment in this much more than the execution. The idea behind it is that not everyone gets what they want. No surprises there! But you can at least enjoy what you did get or what you already have. The idea is that this one family created a little paper 'car' which was actually a truck. I'm not sure why the original 'camion' (Spanish for 'truck') was translated this way unless it's because it's hard to get good rhymes with 'truck', but since car (In Spanish, that is 'coche') is only used in a rhyme once (with jar) in the entire book, it seems like a better choice would be 'cab', maybe.

However, this book was designed as a paperback with cutout plans for your own truck, which you can glue or stick together, so they were really rather locked into the original scheme. Anyway the idea is that they fill the back of the truck with their own grateful notes - about something they got which may not have been ideal, but for which they were thankful. This is a great attitude to have, but is the irony that the artwork in this book is so poor that one really needs to fill out a note saying how grateful we are for the bad artwork, because it's better than none at all?

I honestly do not know how this English version was made, but the feeling I got, right or wrong, is that maybe there never was an electronic version of this and in order to create the English review version, the original had to be scanned into a computer and maybe have English text added to it? Whatever it was, the end result is completely unacceptable.

The electronic version I got was appallingly scrappy, with very grainy artwork and poor positioning of the English text. I can't commend a version like this. Like I said, I never get to see the print version, but I sincerely hope it's better than this; however, given that all I have to judge this by is the version I was allowed to download, I cannot commend it because the design and quality of it are a disaster. Children - especially the impoverished ones this is evidently aimed at - deserve a lot better than this.

Jake and Ava A Boy and a Fish by Jonathan Balcombe, Rebecca Evans

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

I had thought this would be another grandpa fishing story, but it turned out to be a whole other kettle of fish, and being a lifelong vegetarian myself, I fully approved! It's a great book to be reviewing as the COP26 goes on right now.

I admired the stance taken here, because it's a very hard sell in the USA where everyone grows up feeling they have the innate right to rape and pillage nature and the hell with the consequences, and very few people ever truly question it - not really question it. But the fact is that life doesn't work the way most Americans like to comfortably think it does. The world isn't our oyster. Nature isn't here for us, and it isn't endlessly resilient. Now this self-centered 'I own it' attitude is coming back around to bite us, and we're starting to learn some hard lessons.

Fortunately Jake learns an easy lesson when he goes on the traditional fishing trip with grandpa. I never did go an any trips with any grandpas, but I would definitely have been Jake had I done so! They find a nice creek to set a lure and sit there waiting for a bite. This is how we mimic the manly man 'conquering' nature. Sad, isn't it? Meanwhile we get the underwater story too, as an uncle and his niece - archer fish - go out hunting themselves, and Ava is the fish who mistakenly bites on Jake's lure.

Jake chooses compassion for the fish and lets her go. He will never know it was Ava, and she will never know it was Jake, but that was decidedly a magical moment! I fully commend this book as both a worthy read and an unexpected and unusual bonus. And I wish it all the success in the world.

I'll Go Rhythm by Justin Webb, Kayla Stark

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This was a sweet and up-to-the-minute book of about 20 pages, creatively illustrated by Stark, and written in rhyme by Webb. It's about how people are herded and misled by the social media that most of us are hobbled to. I loved the title! Very much my kind of a play on words!

If you wanted to watch something truly scary for Halloween, you should have ditched the usual fare and watched a documentary on Netflix titled The Social Dilemma which is about how the social networks drill down on you and record your every nuance every time you do anything online. They know you better than you know yourself and they have algorithms in place to take advantage of the vast database that they own and that is you, and they will feed you things that are not intended to be necessarily in your best interest, but which are certainly intended to stroke your ego and keep you addicted to the platform you're on. There's a reason people who avail themselves of these services are called 'users'. It's the reason I have zero social media presence.

That was very much a documentary aimed at grown-ups; this book could well be the young children-accessible equivalent, right here. The story explains in terms children can understand, how your 'phantom friend' will come and lure you into seeking approval, getting those all-important likes, going down rabbit holes that reinforce themselves all along the way, and essentially wasting time getting depressed about your life and feeling bad about yourself, buoyed up just enough, now and then from the occasional thrill of finding something you like or that seems designed especially with you in mind, to keep you coming back. It's a sad and dependent way to live, and this book illustrated the dangers admirably - along with the wise choice of the girl to go her own way and follow the beat of her own drum. I commend it as a worthy read.

The Adventures of Johnny Butterflyseed by Tarisa Parrish, Stephanie Richoll

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

The United States is a nation not known for its love of monarchs - in fact, its very existence is due to overturning one. Whether that historical lack of respect has any bearing on the plight of the present day monarch butterfly is an open question, but these are modern day monarchs which are suffering every bit as much as King George 3rd did with his mystery illness. They're just suffering in a different way.

With the solid words of Parrish, based on real-life experience, and the beautiful art of Richoll and her charming butterfly girls, this book tells a short story of how every one of us can become a 'butterfly farmer' and help grow the milkweed that in turns grows the monarchs, and will help them recover from farming practices that have not been the monarch's friend - nor the friend to a host of other wildlife either.

For me the language of the story was a bit overly-florid at times, but it was about flowers and butterflies after all, so I guess I can't complain about that! I did love the story, and especially the can-do positivity, as well as the idea that everybody can pitch in here, and I fully commend this as a worthy read.

The Happy Owls by Celestino Piatti

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

Boldly drawn and colored by the author, this book is short and sweet and very much to the point, if only you're open to the message! The owls always seem content, cooing softly in their tumble-down ruin of a building. Meanwhile in the nearby farmyard, the animals are always feeding their faces and then squabbling. The wise owls try to explain that they should enjoy the moment, live for the now, and enjoy each new season as it comes around once more, but the impatient farmyard critters don't seem to get it. The owls do though and that's all that matters to them! They can't force others to understand. The story was entertaining and surprisingly deep and warm, and I commend this as a worthy read.

The Power of Kindness Through the Eyes of Children by Ruth Maille

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

Written by Ruth Maille, with art by the Pencilmaster Studio, this book of about twenty nicely-illustrated and colorful pages talks children through not only what kindness actually is, but also encourages them to share examples of kind things that a child might do, thereby illustrating and reinforcing an important lesson. There are many ways to be kind, and this book certainly gives a wide variety of options, ideas, and suggestions. The artwork is wonderfully diverse, although it would not have hurt to have had a disability represented in there. Other than that, it was very well done and I commend this as a worthy read.

Feeling Lonely by Mary Lindeen

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This is the third of three books by this author for young kids I'll be reviewing this month, which focus on difficult feelings that children may have, and may not even have a name for, much less understand, but which are an important part of life; sometimes a debilitating one, and which cover topics such as sadness, shyness, and in this case, loneliness. The book does a great job of dissociating minor, transient feelings of being alone, from a more serious condition of feeling lonely and not a part of things, even when there are others around you having fun and enjoying company.

The book is about thirty pages long and consists of a series of photographs, mostly of children, accompanied by short captions discussing the topic, asking questions, offering ideas and suggestions about what to do if you have these feelings, how to recognize them, and how to deal with them if you think you see these same feelings in others.

The captions are not overly dramatic. They're quite nuanced and very reasonable, and indicate that some people might not just be alone on occasion, but more commonly feel apart and isolated from everyone else even when there are others around. I felt this was a good approach in that it leads children to think more about their feelings and to distinguish better between something that's not a worry, and something else that might need their attention, and even the help of others.

The book is very diverse in its imagery, featuring children of all ethnicities, but for me there was a complete lack of pictures showing children with any sort of disability. While I can see how that could distract somewhat from the main topic, or perhaps even lead to some confusion, my own feeling is that it would not hurt to have shown a child with crutches or in a wheelchair or something like that. A disability might well be a root cause of feelings of loneliness, sadness, or shyness.

That was my only concern about the book. Otherwise it was wonderful, and I commend this one as a worthy read to both educate children to the problem of loneliness, which is not easy to pin down, and also to encourage those who are experiencing such feelings to open up and perhaps even encourage them to reach out and seek the help they need as well as promote awareness in other children of these conditions.

Feeling Sad by Mary Lindeen

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This is the second of three books by this author for young kids I'll be reviewing this month, which focus on difficult feelings that children may have, and may not even have a name for, much less understand, but which are an important part of life; sometimes a debilitating one, and which cover topics such as loneliness, shyness, and in this case, sadness.

The book is about thirty pages long and consists of a series of photographs, mostly of children, accompanied by short captions discussing the topic, asking questions, offering ideas and suggestions about what to do if you have these feelings, how to recognize them, and how to deal with them if you think you see these same feelings in others. Feelings of sadness can derive from a variety of sources and this book does a great job is indicating this.

The captions are not overly dramatic. They're nuanced and reasonable, and indicate that some people might experience some of these feelings part of the time, but otherwise feel fine. In other cases, the feelings might be more pressing. I felt this was a good approach in that it leads thoughts into these areas without risking making children feel like they might be experiencing something they're really not.

Some of the children are so small in these pictures, and so perfectly-formed tiny human beings that it's really a grave pain in the heart to imagine any of them might have feelings such as those that this - and the other books - try to address, but it is a fact of life, and the sooner it's addressed, the better off we all are, not just the child who might be experiencing unaccountable feelings of sadness.

The book is commendably diverse in the imagery it employs, featuring children of all ethnicities. I did note a complete lack of pictures showing children with any sort of disability. I can see how that might distract somewhat from the main topic, or perhaps even lend some confusion, but I honestly do not think it would have hurt to have shown a child with crutches or in a wheelchair. A disability might well be a root cause of feelings of loneliness, sadness, or shyness.

That was my only concern about the book. Otherwise it was wonderful, and I commend this one as a worthy read to both educate children to the issue of sadness in young children, especially when they have been, and are going, through hell with the pandemic, and hopefully to encourage those who don't feel at their happiest, to reach out to others instead of withdrawing.

Feeling Shy by Mary Lindeen

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This is the first of three books by this author for young kids I'll be reviewing this month, which focus on difficult feelings that children may have, and may not even have a name for, much less understand, but which are an important part of life; sometimes a debilitating one, and which cover topics such as loneliness, sadness, and in this case, shyness. I can relate since I was terribly shy as a kid. Actually maybe not terribly - I was rather good at being shy!

The book is about thirty pages long and consists of a series of photographs, mostly of children, accompanied by short captions discussing the topic, asking questions, offering ideas and suggestions about what to do if you have these feelings, how to recognize them, and how to deal with them if you think you see these same feelings in others.

The captions are not overly dramatic. They're nuanced and reasonable, and indicate that some people might experience some of these feelings part of the time, but otherwise feel fine. In other cases, the feelings might be more pressing. I felt this was a good approach in that it leads thoughts into these areas without risking making children feel like they might be experiencing something they're really not.

The book is very diverse in its imagery, featuring children of all ethnicities. I did note a complete lack of pictures showing children with any sort of disability. I can see how that might distract somewhat from the main topic, or perhaps even lend some confusion, but I honestly do not think it would have hurt to have shown a child with crutches or in a wheelchair. A disability might well be a root cause of feelings of loneliness, sadness, or shyness.

That was my only concern about the book. Otherwise it was wonderful, and I commend this one as a worthy read to both educate children to this problem, and to encourage those who are shy to perhaps find ways out of that shell of isolation.

Twas the Night by Marin Darmonkow

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This was a beautifully-done book, with twelve pages (double page spreads that is - very likely for each of the twelve days of Christmas!) and no text at all. It tells itself: a young wheelchair-traveling boy finds an injured dove and takes it home and cares for it until it's well, and in doing so dreams of flying away from his own confinement, just as the dove must also dream. Sweet story, beautiful sentiments, gorgeous Christmassy illustrations. I commend it fully as a worthy seasonal read.

Sailing With Her Wolf by Ariel Marie

Rating: WARTY!

This is probably another novel I should never have embarked upon, but I liked the idea and I always hope for the best when starting a novel. Unfortunately, this one went wrong fast because of the author's focus on sex instead of upon a relationship.

I made it through the first third and quickly grew the feeling that this story was wrong-headed and not remotely appealing to me. I pressed on for a little while, hoping it would improve, but it just got worse. In the end (the end of the first third, anyway!), I DNF'd it for its obsession with sex, and the poor writing.

The story is of werewolf (or whatever the female term is, since the 'were' in werewolf, means man) named Marley, who has the sadly laughable last name of 'Gerwulf'. I mean really? Marley is lesbian and her friend Zara York, who she's known since high school, knows this. They know everything about each other. Yet never once have they connected or even talked about it, evidently, other than being BFFs.

This felt off to me, esspecailly since the book blurb insists that 'Marley's wolf' had identified Zara as her 'mate' the day they met. Yet here they are, both entering their thirties, and...Nothing. Got. Done. The blurb ridiculously says that "the urge to mate was strong," but this made zero sense, since as lesbians, they would not have the offpsring that mating implies, so whence this 'mating' urge? And if it's not mating, then why not use some other term? It felt like the author hadn't thoguht this through.

Don't get me wrong. Anyone who's read anything reasonably deep about the natural world knows that humans did not invent queer. We like to think we did, but the animal - and even plant - world had long had queer before we ever evolved. There are gay relationships all over nature; lesbian ones; bisexual ones, and even transgender arrived in nature long before humans thought they'd invented it. Hell, I just read in the news very recently that California condors have been shown to have reproduced asexually, which was not something science was aware they could do - not until now! Let's hear it for lesbian condors! Yeay!

There's nothing new under the sun, so the problem here isn't with a gay shifter relationship. It's with the 'mating compulsion' which implies a drive to produce offpsring, which will never materialize - not with each of the main characters as a biological parent. So whence this urge? What does it mean exactly? This would have been the perfect place for some self-examination by the main characters: a book like this one.

But the author never touches it! Why not? She never deals with it; never tries to explain it, and never discusses it. It's like she put this out there blindly as a wolf prerogative - a dominant wolf necessity - without thinking it through, and without even seeing the beautiful story possibilities that were here. It's like she was so obsessed with the sex that she never gave a minute's thought to the people she had created and was putting through this lackluster story. That's why this made no sense to me. It felt like a profligate waste of a glorious story opportunity - one that I am now going to have to write, and I don't even like shifter stories that much!

The blurb asks stupidly, "will Marley be able to protect Zara while resisting the call to mate" and the answer is hell no! They jump each other's bones the very first night they're stranded through the tired cliché of sharing a bed to stay warm. It's tedious. And no, there's no 'mating'. They have sex, but that's not what 'mating' implies!

So these two women set sail on a yatch, get caught in a storm which damages the engine, and shuts down all the electronics on their boat, and so they're adrift together until they get rescued. It would be the perfect place to explore a real relationship in depth, but this author sadly takes the path most traveled and therefore least interesting, and she squanders even that journey on sex scenes that read like a thesaurus of body parts. It's not erotic, not romantic, not exciting, and not entertaining, and I can't commend it at all.

Born of Water by Autumn M Birt

Rating: WARTY!

This was this author's self-published debut from 2012, and as such it's not awfully bad, but I could not get along with it at all, partly because the writing felt young for the age range it was supposedly aimed at. There were other reason too, which I shall go into. I can empathize, because that's about when I started self-publishing, but I have to judge a book by its content, not how much I might empathize with the author!

This is very much trope from start to - well finish, I assume, but I DNF'd this at just shy of a third in, so I can't comment on the last two-thirds, nor can I commend it based on my reading. I was offered no reason to believe the last two-thirds would be any different from the first third - otherwise I might have been tempted to read on.

The trope approach covered everything from the way the story was written, to the characters, to the romance, to the magic employed. The magic was the usual tedious 'four elements' plus a special additional one - which has been so done to death now that it's a joke: you know: air, earth, fire, water? Which are actually not elements. The additional one in this case was the ability to use all four which is not only rare, but also frowned upon. So more Air-Bender than anything else, and certainly nothing new.

The story is set in the trope world where an authority controls magic, and rather than appreciate something out of the ordinary, this author takes the trope path that it's anathema to exhibit 'alien magic' and carries a death sentence, so naturally (and more trope) one of the enforcers of these laws encounters someone who has this special snowflake magic and instead of turning her in, goes on the run with her and three of her friends.

That wouldn't have been so bad except that it then became a tedious case of endless fleeing; from one port to another and always running into trouble, never getting even a hint of a break. It became boring to read because every arrival at every port was essentially fraught with the same peril. Yawn!

As if that wasn't bad enough, a really poorly-written 'romance' begans stirring between Niri, the main enforcer character, and some dude who was with them, maybe named Ty? I forget. All of these charcters wre really enimently forgettable. But the romance was so slapped together and pasted on that it was pointless, and not worth reading. Instead of it seemingly arising organically, it felt like the author had forced it into being because she felt there had to be a romance - more trope. Gods forbid that there should be a leading female character in a YA novel who can get by without a male to prop her up. Yawn. I didn't like it.

The title of this novel should have warned me off it. Comparisons with Sarah Maas and Anne McCaffery should have warned me off, but I didn't listen and I paid the price of wasting my valuable time on it. That's how it goes. But at least in a couple of months I'll be through reviewing books foever, and I won't have to waste more time on a book I DNF'd by having to pen a review for it! So there's that!

The Diamond Master by Jacques Futrelle

Rating: WARTY!

I made it through 80% of this classic mystery book before I all but died of sheer boredom. It's a very short book - about 100 pages - but it made for a slow and tedious read and I just lost interest in it. Jacques Futrelle was an American author who was on the Titanic when it sank

The basic story is that diamonds begin showing up, delivered anonymously to well-known diamond merchants. When it becomes known there has been more than one such delivery, the merchants meet and discover that each of the five of them has received an extremely beautiful and well-cut diamond that is identical in every way to the ones the others received. Once they're aware of the others, they receive further communcation assuring them the damond is real and is theirs to keep. All they have to do in return is to sell an improbably large quantity of diamonds - which will be supplied to them - and the hundred-million dollar profits of which sales will be delivered to a certain individual.

Despite trying to keep tabs on the man who is runnign this operation, he proves always to be one step ahead of them and the private detectives they hire. This was pretty much the entire story for this first 80%, and it was poorly-written, obvious in many cases what was going on, and with an appallingly presented German accent in one charcter which was frankly obnoxious and nauseating tor ead. I grew bored, as I said, and ditched it. I can't commend it.

Sexus Animalis by Emmanuelle Pouydebat

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

Subtitled "There Is Nothing Unnatural in Nature" and written with a delightfully playful sense of humor, this books explores a sampling of animal (including non-vertebrates) sexual behaviors and appendages, making for an incredible read. And I mean that literally - it's hardly possible to credit some of these things, although I have no doubt that they're true.

There's the water boatman, for example, which has - and I am stating this correctly - the loudest penis in the world, for its size. There is a fish, known o-fish-ially as the Phallostethus cuulong, that is quite ltierally, a dick head. Since there was a walrus, it would have been nice to have included a carpenter - ant, but I guess that was too much to hope for! I suppose there's nothing particularly special about the ants when it comes to this subject. There's the clownfish - and this ain't your children's Nemo. I've concluded they get their name from the clowning around they do with lines of succession, and gender changes. And the young have a brief rumspringa, too!

Oh yes. Any idiot creationists who try to claim that their god made everything to perfection just a few thousand years ago and exactly as we see it now, will have some serious work to do to supply intelligent explanations for the variety of behaviors - some of which are despicable - that their creator purportedly made. The bedbug comes immediately to mind. It's equipped with a literal weapon - it's not just a euphemism in the case of a bedbug. It's supplied with a beveled penis that stabs right through the female's exoskeleton and it doesn't matter - to the male - where penetration is made. This is only one story of such brutality. There's also rape in the animal kingdom: it's not just a human thing.

On a much more pleasant note, there is also love in the animal kingdon - at least amongst the higher species - which includes rats! There are also gay relationships and transgender changes, and masturbation, so as they say, there's nothing new under the sun and not a whole heck of a lot of difference between animals and humans - who are also animals - when it comes to sexual expression.

There is over thirty such stories of amazing variety included here: of impressive stamina and record-setting activity, along with numberous asides that are relevant if slightly off the main topic. The book made for a perverse and fascinating read and I commend it fully.

High-Protein Plant-Based Diet for Beginners by Maya A Howard

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

Aimed at readers who want to pursue a healthier, plant-based diet but don't want to do it through prepackaged and preprocessed foods that have been swarming onto the market lately, this book takes a step back to the original ingredients and follows a logical and step-by-step approach to planning a week-long menu, buying the ingredients, cooking up the food, and enjoying it!

I have to say as an aside that one aspect bothered me a little, in that there seemed to be no concern expressed here over sustainability or the environment. California is the market garden of the US, and its agriculture takes eighty percent of California's fresh water. Almonds alone use a trillion gallons of water every year, and this continues at in the height of an ongoing drought, and as new laws in California have required utilities to reduce water usage by 55 gallons per person per day by 2023!

This book has, as its focus, the creation of plant-based meals, and while that's wonderful as far as it goes, I would have been happier if a word or two had been included about the advisability of, for example, using almonds to create almond milk as the severe water crisis continues. Personally I refuse to eat almonds, but maybe that's just me.

That concern aside though, the main focus here - as the title suggests - isn't just getting healthy and nutritious food into your diet, but also finding plenty of protein along with the other vitamins and minerals a body needs. The book provides ready information on the best plants for protein, and also useful tips on how to combine such foods to make a balanced diet. This information is put fully into play by means of the extensive meal plans that the book is filled with. When it comes to creating a plant-based diet from fresh produce, I do not think you could find a better book, and I commend this one fully as a worthy and useful read.

When I'm a Surgeon by Samantha Pillay, Harry Aveira

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This was an adorable book, written by Samantha Pillay, who actually is a surgeon, and illustrated charmingly by Harry Aveira, but it's more than just about being a surgeon, which might have made for a slightly tedious read! The book is really about becoming a better person all around: about love, kindness, thoughtfulness, empathy, ambition, dedication and a host of other traits.

The story repeats a phrase on each new page and adds something to it that was different from what went before - in a sense like an affirmation, and the sweet illustrations show a warm picture of what that affirmation translates to - even in a small and child-like manner. The book is wonderful, inspiring, and very positive and should encourage young girls everywhere to, as the phrase has it, be all they can be - in whatever life they choose for themselves. I unreservedly commend it.

Basho's Haiku Journeys by Freeman Ng, Cassandra Rockwood-Ghanem

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

This was a short, but gorgeously-illustrated book (by the talented Cassandra Rockwood-Ghanem who, I was pleased to see was decently credited on the cover). I loved the dramatic cover, with Basho sweeping back the curtain of night onto a brand new day.

The book briefly follows Japanese poet Basho's travels during his later life after his house burned down. You know what they say? If life hands you lemons, throw them at the son of a bitch who unloaded them on you, but Basho wasn't like that. Instead, he saw homelessness as an opportunity to go walkabout, and he took off on a series of five contemplative trips, some of which were perilous, all of which were inspiring.

Basho did not invent the haiku, but he is credited with being, if you like, the godfather of its enduring popularity. The author, Freeman Ng, tells this whole story in haiku, which in English has come to mean a simple three-line poem, typically associated with the season, which consists of five, seven, and five syllables. In Japanese, the count is seventeen 'on' which is a unit of Japanese speech similar to a syllable. Poems like a haiku, but that don't adhere to the strict haiku rules, are more properly called a 'senryu'.

This book was a delight: nicely-written and with some truly inspiring (and amusing at times) illustrations. I commend it as a worthy read.

The Secret Halloween Costume by Sophie Vaillancourt, Karina Dupuis

Rating: WORTHY!

From an advance review copy for which I thank the publisher.

Translated (from French I'm guessing!) by John Conn, this sweet look at indpendent-thinking on Halloween, was a delight. Beautifully-illustrated in glowing Halloween colors by Dupuis, and written intelligently by someone with the amazingly French name of Sophie Vaillancourt (I hear that with a delightful French accent in my head as I type it!).

Anyway, this is the story of Charlotte, who doesn't want to be scary on Halloween. I adored the illustration on page 4 of the story where Charlotte is contemplatively upset and strutting away from her oblivious mom, who is determnined to have scary witches on halloween.

Rebelling against mom's antiquated ideas, Charlotte decides to try something new, and she recruits her grandmother to help, so that when the day comes, she dresses how she wants, not how tradition (and mom) dictate. She's can still be a witch without being scary; how about a superhero witch who just looks amazing!

I must confess I'm not sure what the 'with two-way sequins' was all about on the cover. Sequin means the same thing in English or in French. I assume this had something to do with the print version, which I do not merit as an amateur reviewer.

I've been reviewing Net Galley books faithfully since early 2015 (and other books for two years prior to that). I've reviewed almost 1400 books from them in that time - a wide range of books, fiction and non-fiction, from a wide vaiety of publishers, but do the reviewers get any kind of consideration or appreciation? Nope! We don't expect it, because it's all take and no give in this business! But it's the time-consuming thanklessness of this endeavor which is why I'm quitting reviewing altogether at the end of this year. I have better things to do with my time!

But the sequins? I have no idea what that's about because there are no sequins in this book! LOL! Despite that dire lack of sequins, I still commend it as a worthy read!